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Chapter 514 - 514 Dragging Tail



And no, that was not because [Beast Sense] detected the mounts. As I haven’t mentioned earlier, Folk, including the Awakened, only show up when acting purely on instinct. For example, most hunting cats won’t show up reliably unless about to pounce. And prey animals like rabbits have that weird thing where you can sense a thirty foot area, and they’ll be inside it, somewhere.

Anyway, my first warning that I’d been found was three birds overhead, flying in formation against the wind. I’d been swimming downstream for the speed granted by [Titanic Swimming], but upon seeing the birds act in ways birds normally don’t, I made for the left bank and climbed to the lip to see what had them out of sorts.

It was only this curiosity that had me on the same level as the three riders and their lizards approached. At first, I thought I’d met one of them (the riders, not the mounts) before. But no, it was just a similarly dyed shirt on someone with an obviously different face. I waved greetings at the appropriate distance, but they chose not to wave back.

“You,” said the eldest rider, “went missing a week ago. We thought you were dead.”

“That’s understandable.” I said. “I almost was. Dead, that is. I was most probably missing.”

He turned his head and spat. “Oh, you were missing. Not being where one is expected, such as perhaps in the camp one is a captive of? Not being where people look for a period of two days? You admit it, you were missing.”

“I... I cannot say that.” I said.

“You will, or I’ll pin you to the ground with my spear...”

.....

“I am a Truthspeaker.” I said. “I literally cannot lie to you, no matter how you threaten me.”

“Well,” he said, “I’ve found that people do the most unexpected things when they are properly tormented.”

I sighed, and began strapping a shield from my inventory to my left arm.

“What good is that going to do you?” he asked. “You, Truthspeaker, are sworn to peaceful conduct.”

“For so long as the Kamajeen abide by hospitality, yes.” I said.

“It’s not worth it, uncle.” one of the two younger riders said. “I wouldn’t want to have to explain to the vizier that we killed the khan’s prize.”

“Prize?” I asked.

“Our mighty and just khan means to ransom you back to your people for a mere sixty gold coins worth of metal tools and fertile seed.” the elder admitted.

Heels of my palms just behind my eyes, I massaged my skull. “That... is not going to go well for him.” I said. “The Slayer of Monsters...”

“I heard,” the young woman said, “That once there were over a dozen minotaur, and that now you are down to just five.”

“What?” I asked. “That is nowhere near accurate, not since...”

I took a deep breath, let it out.

<It doesn’t have the same amount of magic, this time.> one of the lizards said.

<Similar scent, but different.> the one with blue stripes on its flanks agreed.

The eldest’s lizard grunted, and lay down on its belly. <No. I’ve only smelled this once before. Something Cosmic has marked him.>

“Bwah!” said the rider, kicking the flanks of his mount with his heels. “I’m not trying to dismount, you dang beast!”

<“That beast,”> I said and sent, <“shows a great deal of common sense.”>

The riding lizard rolled its eyes. <Oh, not THIS again. He actually speaks to me every few days. knows better.> Perhaps an act of defiance, he squirmed a bit, finding a more comfortable position on the ground, and set his head down, as well.

“Aaaa!” the rider screamed at it, making the mistake of dismounting.

As soon as his weight was no longer upon it, it bolted downslope toward the river.

“May you LICK a CACTUS!” he screamed. “Go hump a rocky protrusion, you worthless...”

The young woman nodded at her own lizard, looking over his shoulder at her. “Oh no!” she said, as both other lizards slowly walked down to the water. “Our wild mounts are beyond our control.”

“Don’t you do this!” the elder shouted at her. “It’s my tent you sleep in, young lady.”

“I would like to help you, for your nephew’s sake, but as you can see, my reckless and playful mount has a mind of its own.”

“I will THROW YOU OUT!” he screamed.

“Nah. Who would wipe down your smelly tent, and see that the womenfolk actually washed your nasty clothing?”

He sucked air in past his clenched teeth. “Go.” he told his nephew. “See she doesn’t fall in by accident.”

“And what about when she falls in deliberately?” he asked.

“Do nothing that I must tell your mother about.”

The younger had a flush of red warmth on his cheeks, but mostly his ears.

At me, he shook his spear. “You be glad I’ve got other things to see to. Go on, then, if you mean to return to captivity. But I’ll brook no attempt to shirk your earlier vows. Those still hold, even if I haven’t heard them spoken here by my own ears.”

I sighed. “Such DOES appear to be part of my Truthspeaker oath.”

“I don’t... wait, is that splashing?”

“It does seem to be, yes.” I said.

“What in the Nameless God is going on down there? Oh, by Mohammed’s itchy ballsack! Someone had better get my lizard under control by the time I get down there!”

I proceeded south, but the sun was a tiny sliver of orange on the horizon when I made it to the inner patrol of footmen near the camp.

“Halt, and identify...! Oh, it’s you.” the guard said, with all the enthusiasm one expresses upon stepping into centaur dung.

“We thought you were dead.” said his partner.

I thumped my chest twice, in the Achean style. “I am healthy, and free of disease.”

Oh, crap! I was! All those diseases I’d spent so long collecting! All gone.

I scrolled my reticule over first one, then the other. Of course, it wasn’t going to be that easy.

“This way.” said the younger guard. “Try nothing, start nothing, and there shall be no spear poking out the backside of your liver.”

“I don’t think I’ve done anything to deserve that tone.” I said.

“Monstrous heretics like you never do.”

“So which is worse to you?” I asked. “My scales, or my faith?”

“Hassim. The reptile is baiting you.” the one guard said to the other.

“My feelings are pure.” Hassim told me. “Once you forsake your false gods, perhaps then the True would forgive you. Until then, I can hate you completely for both your profane conditions, the accident of your birth AND the further deliberate heathen behaviors.”

“I cannot change the one, and am unlikely to change the other. You are free to hate me, as purely and strongly as you desire.”

“Then I shall.” Hassim said. “But my hatred of you and your sinful ways aside...”

The other guard cleared his throat. “Which of us is the senior guard?”

Hassim bowed his head, made an ornate series of gestures, like he was unfolding an invisible blanket.

“You are welcome, little lizard shifter, to rejoin the camp. But for formality’s sake, you agree to the same oath?”

I blinked. “For the time during which hospitality is extended, I shall offer no hostility to the khan, nor to any of his loyal subjects. Although I may leave the camp and the safety of its guards during the day, I shall make every reasonable attempt to return by nightfall.”

“Close enough.” the elder said.

“What are you DOING?” the younger asked. He wagged a finger at me. “You will honor our women, and not seek to see them in their nakedness, nor to touch them inappropriately.”

I let a disgusted noise burst from my throat. “I am far too young, I do so swear.”

“And,” he said, “you shall honor our ways, our traditions, our laws, and our religion for the duration of your stay.”

“I will honor the laws as I know them, and leave you to your own ways. As for your religion, the God I follow saved my life not even a week ago, in a very direct and public manner. I won’t be forcing his worship down your throats, so don’t try to choke me with yours.”

“Kneel, and swear!” he said, setting a hand upon his sword.

“I’m really very sorry about his behavior.” the senior guard said.

“BLASPHEMY!” the younger screamed. “You take that back RIGHT NOW.”

The elder stepped between us, his arms extended to either side.

“Do not overstep your place.” he told the junior guard. “YOUR KHAN has extended hospitality to this one. Are you defying his will? Strike me down, then. My failure as your tutor has earned me that painful death.”

The younger turned his head and spat. “While my khan offers you hospitality, my sword and spear will strike at your enemies, and my shield protect your body as my own. Welcome to the Royal Camp of the Kamajeen.”


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