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Jiang Xu picked up his phone and wanted to send Shen Fangyu a message, but he typed several times and finally deleted them all.

He stared at the phone for a while, and his mind was full of his mother\'s voice. He wanted to cover his ears, but the voice sounded more clearly in his mind.

After an unknown amount of time, there was a rustling sound at the door. He looked over suddenly, but the visitor didn\'t come in. He just half-opened the door and asked in a low voice, "Can I come in?"

It was Shen Fangyu\'s voice.

Jiang Xu\'s eyes paused, and after a brief moment of silence, he replied: "Yes."

Shen Fangyu went in after hearing his response. He closed the door, followed Jiang Xu\'s line of sight, and landed on the trophies he had placed all over the place.

"I also participated in this competition back then." He looked at the trophy of Jiang Xu\'s physics competition with a little surprise. "I remember that after reaching the finals, the coach arranged for the No. 4 and No. 6 teams to train together."

After he finished speaking, there was a little regret in his eyes, "But then I got a little sick, so I didn\'t go, otherwise I would have known you earlier."

Jiang Xu\'s eyes flickered, and he tilted his head and said, "Farewell, leave me a more relaxed high school life.

Shen Fangyu couldn\'t help laughing, "Yes."

"Does it hurt?" Jiang Xu asked suddenly.

Shen Fangyu didn\'t seem to have expected that he would be caught off guard by asking this question. Afraid that Jiang Xu would be worried, he quickly denied it first, "It doesn\'t hurt," and then teased, pretending to be relaxed, "But Jiang Xu, this is the only one other than you. It\'s the first time someone hits me."

Jiang Xu lowered his eyelashes, and after a while, he asked, "What are you doing here?"

"If I don\'t guard you at night, I don\'t worry, I\'m afraid you won\'t feel well."

"Aren\'t you going to sleep?"

Shen Fangyu opened the chair in front of his desk and said to Jiang Xu: "Go to sleep, I\'m not pregnant, it\'s okay to stay up all night. I have to go back before I get up in the morning, so as not to let your parents see it, it\'s a big deal Catch up on sleep in the car tomorrow."

Jiang Xu\'s eyes flicked over Shen Fangyu\'s feet, which were only wearing socks. Shen Fangyu caught his eyes and explained with a smile, "I\'m worried that your parents didn\'t dare to put on shoes because they heard it."

Jiang Xuna nodded at the slippers on the side of the bed, "It\'s cold on the ground, wear mine."

Shen Fangyu walked over and stepped on his shoes, his eyes were crooked: "Why are you so considerate today, I\'m not used to it."

Jiang Xu glanced at him, and after a while, he looked away again and said, "How about..."

Lie in bed.

"Um?"

While hesitating, before Jiang Xu finished the second half of the sentence, Shen Fangyu had already sat back on the wooden chair in front of his desk in two steps, "What else?"

Jiang Xu: "..."

"It\'s nothing." Jiang Xu turned off the light and lay down, pulled the quilt to his chest, buried his whole body in the quilt, only his head was exposed.

"If you\'re bored, just check your phone."

"The light on your phone can easily affect your sleep," Shen Fangyu said, "It\'s okay, I\'m not bored."

Jiang Xu let out an "oh" and closed his eyes.

Before Shen Fangyu came, his parents\' expressions of shock and disappointment had been lingering in his mind, but for some reason, when he closed his eyes this time, he felt that Shen Fangyu had attracted all of his attention.

Probably because the night was so quiet, Jiang Xu even felt that he could hear Shen Fangyu\'s breathing.

This knowledge made him wonder what Shen Fangyu was doing, whether his eyes were closed or open, was he taking a nap, or was he thinking about problems, if he was thinking about problems... was he thinking about academic problems, or... life problem?

"Can\'t sleep?" Shen Fangyu suddenly said.

Jiang Xu seemed to be caught by the teacher as an active student, suddenly felt a little guilty, and after a brief silence, he gave a very soft "hmm".

"Is it because your pink bunny doll is not here?" Shen Fangyu analyzed, "I see that you like to hold it every time you sleep. Sudden changes in sleeping habits are prone to insomnia."

"How do you know I\'m not asleep?"

"Watch you sleep a few more times and you\'ll know," Shen Fangyu said, "If you really fell asleep, you wouldn\'t be so motionless. I think you\'ve been frozen in one position for a long time."

Jiang Xu pursed his lips, realizing that the question he just thought about might have an answer.

—Shen Fangyu opened his eyes without taking a nap, looking at him.

I don\'t know if it\'s because this cognition has touched something soft in Jiang Xu\'s heart, or because the night is easy to make people more emotional and more eager to talk, Jiang Xu suddenly continued Shen Fangyu\'s words about the pink rabbit.

"Surgery on plush toys and so on, I made it up casually before, I didn\'t expect it to scare you." He confessed.

"Okay, Jiang Xu, you\'ll fail at some point." Shen Fangyu\'s lips were stained with a smile.

Jiang Xu folded the corner of the pillow, and continued: "When I... was young, my aunt gave me a plush toy, which was also a pink rabbit."

"Huh?" Shen Fangyu put on a listening look.

"My parents\' hometown has different customs. My mother is a bit feudal and superstitious. She thinks that giving boys plush toys will make them look too weak and lack masculinity. She has always been very taboo about these things."

"Actually, my aunt didn\'t have any malicious intentions, but after my aunt left, my mother cut up the toy and threw it into the trash can. Even with the nickname \'Rongrong\', she didn\'t let the family call it, saying yes. Too delicate, not good."

"That nickname was also given by my aunt," Jiang Xu explained: "It\'s been so long since no one mentioned it, I almost forgot it. I just remembered it when I heard my aunt call it that day."

"Actually, I didn\'t particularly like plush toys at first, but since I saw that scene, I often have nightmares. In my dreams, there is always the broken rabbit doll. I always want to sew it up, but I can\'t sew it well. .”

Jiang Xu took a deep breath, "From then on... I want to be a doctor, and I want to repair my bad body."

"It wasn\'t until I went to live in college and bought the pink rabbit that I gradually stopped having those nightmares," he said, "Later, I gradually began to think that plush toys are cute, so I bought more for decoration. , it seems that the family is not so unpopular."

Shen Fangyu looked at him in the night, his voice was very peaceful, "If you told me this earlier, I wouldn\'t have nightmares."

The expression on Jiang Xu\'s face is obviously not very convinced.

Shen Fangyu said again: "Jiang Xu, your parents have been very strict with you since you were young."

After adapting to the night for a long time, he could still see some things vaguely, such as the certificates on the entire wall, showing how much the Jiang family\'s parents valued all their son\'s honors.

Jiang Xu answered Shen Fangyu in a more reasonable way, "I have high expectations, and I hope I can go in the direction they planned."

That\'s why it\'s hard to accept that their son, whom they have been proud of for half their life, is going to have a baby.

"I feel that when you confess to your parents, the pressure is very high," Shen Fangyu said, "I was thinking, when you told me this, was it so difficult, and was it so uncomfortable in your heart? ...I always feel, thinking about it, it\'s quite unpleasant, a little distressed."

Jiang Xu turned over and sat up, looking at Shen Fangyu: "You didn\'t show any distress at that time."

On the contrary, he also behaved very awkwardly.

"Fluff." Shen Fangyu called him suddenly.

Jiang Xu was startled, and then heard Shen Fangyu say: "From now on, we will live together, you can do whatever you want, you can say whatever you want, and you can say whatever you want, without any pressure."

Not long ago, I heard Ren Han say this to Ren Miao.

Jiang Xu\'s heart was light and hot, and he subconsciously covered up his mood swings with the words of Shen Fangyu, "Aren\'t you ashamed to copy the words of other little girls?"

"What she said is too good," Shen Fangyu said shamelessly, "Famous words must be spread in order to become famous. I\'m helping her carry forward."

Jiang Xu turned his face away too lazy to argue with him, and the room became quiet.

After a while, just when Shen Fangyu thought that Jiang Xu was going to rest, a voice suddenly came from the bedside: "What about you?"

Jiang Xu said: "You seem to have never had any pressure at home."

Shen Fangyu had never heard of his parents before.

"I really don\'t have any pressure." Shen Fangyu smiled, "It\'s quite free, and no one is urging the marriage."

"They don\'t care about you?"

Shen Fangyu shook his head, "Probably I\'ve been stingy since I was a child, they can\'t control me, and they are busy with business, so they don\'t have time to control me."

"At that time, you also planned to hold a school entrance banquet in Chengjia, right?" Jiang Xu suddenly mentioned.

Cheng Jia is a very famous restaurant in City B. Jiang Xu remembers that when he got the first prize in the examination, his parents took him to Cheng Jiading to prepare for the banquet, and heard their manager say that another science champion in City B also planned to serve him. It will be done there, and the original date is still ahead of Jiang Xu and the others.

At that time, Jiang\'s mother also said that she wanted to look at the specifications of the family. They were also champions, and she couldn\'t lose face. But when the original date came, she didn\'t see Shen Fangyu\'s family serving wine. After inquiring, she found out that it seemed to be because of something. cancelled.

"Well, my parents\' business had some problems at the time, and they rushed to other places to solve it, so they canceled it."

Jiang Xu was obviously a little surprised. Shen Fangyu was the number one student in science in City B back then. What kind of parents would be so busy?

Shen Fangyu explained: "My parents don\'t care much about grades, and they don\'t care whether the number one scholar is the number one scholar or not. At that time, I signed the transcripts myself. The story of the widely circulated number one scholar working for a high school student who didn\'t get into college , My parents have always believed in it, thinking that the champion is also a part-time job for others, so they want to start a business."

"And..." he said, "My elder brother was also the No. 1 Scholar back then," he said in a slightly joking tone, "He was the only No. 1 Scholar. Compared with him, my joint No. 1 Scholar is not enough."

It was the first time for Jiang Xu to know these things. He paused and commented: "Your family is very good at learning genes."

"It\'s good to learn about genes, but the old couple just want to do business. Unfortunately, most of the time, the more people want something, the less they can get it. Instead, what they don\'t want comes," he commented: "It\'s just my parents. The talent for doing business is really invisible."

"So many years of losing, losing, and earning, there have been good times, and there have been downturns. After half a lifetime of tossing, I haven\'t saved a penny. Now the old couple are probably tired of tossing, and they have given up the idea of ​​earning us a throne. I wish for my own good fortune, if I can settle down in City A, I will settle down, if I can’t afford a house, I will go back, they have no money to give me anyway.”

He smiled lightly, "Isn\'t it because I deeply realized that my family has no business genes, so I resolutely joined the establishment army and became a doctor? I don’t have time to spend with my children.”

Shen Fangyu\'s tone was very calm, understated, and he couldn\'t tell he cared much, but it made Jiang Xu\'s heart tighten.

"Are they in City B now?"

"Yes," Shen Fangyu replied, "opening a dry cleaning shop in front of our house, we can\'t talk about being rich, at least we don\'t have to worry about food and clothing in a small city like City B."

"...Going back to City B this time, why don\'t you go and see them?"

"I won\'t go back," Shen Fangyu said, "The time is too short. If I go back so suddenly, my parents will definitely go to the vegetable market to buy a lot of chicken, duck and fish. I\'m old and tired. It\'s almost New Years. If you can take a vacation, you can go back."

Thinking of Shen Fangyu who was frying the kitchen at his house at the beginning, Jiang Xu tried to find a topic to adjust the gloomy atmosphere a little bit, "Does your parents cook delicious food?"

Unexpectedly, when this question was asked, Shen Fangyu\'s expression was a little subtle. After a while, he said, "It\'s okay, I only ate a few more times in the past two years."

After he finished speaking, he seemed to realize that what he said was somewhat emotional, so he didn\'t give Jiang Xu a chance to respond, and changed his tone deliberately, and changed the subject: "Jiang Xu...do you think we are so close to each other? It\'s like a university night conference in a dormitory."

He continued with a little smile: "At that time, our dormitory was very lively, and everyone was more able to talk than one, especially after the final exam, they were still talking in full swing at two or three o\'clock."

Jiang Xu concealed the emotion in his eyes indiscriminately, and asked cooperatively, "What are you talking about?"

"You still want to ask me?" Shen Fangyu said, "Don\'t you guys chat in the dormitory?"

Of course they also talked...but what Jiang Xu wanted to know was what Shen Fangyu and the others were talking about.

"Talk about ideals, talk about the future, talk about housing prices in City A, why you study medicine, talk about girls you like, and..." Shen Fangyu paused for a moment, and said deliberately: "Jiang Xu in the dormitory next door."

Jiang Xu let out a low "tss", but Shen Fangyu continued: "But I haven\'t told anyone about my family, you are the first one."

Jiang Xu rubbed his hands on the quilt for a moment, and suddenly asked: "Then can I finish listening?"

Shen Fangyu was stunned when he heard the words, and didn\'t speak for a while.

It didn\'t know when it started to rain outside the window, and the atmosphere between the two of them became a little silent for a moment. The sound of the silent rain was particularly drowsy, but neither of them seemed to want to sleep.

After a long time, Shen Fangyu spoke softly, breaking the silence in the room: "Okay, let me tell you."

He lowered his eyes and pressed his knuckles gently.

"Do you still remember what I told you... I have a real brother." He said, "The year my parents went to sea in City A, I was still young, and I had to be taken care of when I ate, drank, slept, and slept. They felt cumbersome, so I just Take my brother with me."

"When I was young, I lived with my grandparents all the time, and I didn\'t see them once or twice a year. Later, when I was in junior high school, my grandma left, and my grandpa followed soon after."

"At that time, my parents came back to attend the funeral. After the funeral, I thought they would not leave, but they said that my brother was still studying there, and it was inconvenient to transfer schools halfway, so they asked me if I would like to go to school, and they said it was City A. The quality of teaching is good, let me transfer to it.”

"At that time, I was reluctant to part with my classmates and friends here. I didn\'t want to transfer schools, and I didn\'t want my grandparents to be paid homage to me as soon as they left." Shen Fangyu said: "Later, my parents discussed with me, saying that I would wait for my brother to return to his original place for the college entrance examination. In time, they will come back."

Shen Fangyu thought to himself, "It\'s normal to distance yourself from close relatives."

"Afterwards, they gave some money to my uncles, aunts and neighbors, and asked me to eat with my relatives and neighbors one after another. Wherever there is food and dessert, I will not starve to death. , and at that time our school could provide accommodation, which is actually not bad.”

"After a few more years, my brother was admitted to university, and my parents finally came back, but they stayed for a year or two, probably because they found that I have good social skills, and I can\'t starve to death alone, and my brother paid a daughter. My friend, my parents wanted to buy him a house, and went out to make money without worry, and they didn’t come back to settle down until two years ago.”

He looked at the floor of Jiang Xu\'s bedroom, "Maybe he wanted to make it up to me. In the past two years, every time I went back, I cooked a large table of dishes."

"But maybe it\'s because I\'m past the age when I want my parents to care about me." Shen Fangyu smiled and shook his head: "I don\'t think it\'s particularly delicious."

Jiang Xu glanced at him with a complicated expression. Teenage adolescence is the most sensitive time. Letting a middle school student mediate among all kinds of relatives and friends alone can even be regarded as being dependent on others. Jiang Xu thought that if it was him, it would probably be difficult to adapt.

Perhaps it was this kind of experience that made Shen Fangyu more tactful than him, and also more understanding of the world, but this kind of price made Jiang Xu feel a little bit distressed.

Two-thirds of the heart is on the left of the midline, and one-third is on the right. Probably the human heart is naturally biased, and there are not many parents who can keep a bowl of water level.

Because he was born late, and because his eldest brother has reached the peak of excellence, no matter how hard he tries, he will always be chasing in his elder brother\'s footsteps, leaving aside the title of No. It\'s just continuing the glory of my brother, and not embarrassing the family.

It is not new to be out of the champion\'s house once, and to be out again.

"Jiang Xu... Actually, I really want to know what it feels like to be the pride of your parents like you."

Jiang Xu looked at him.

Shen Fangyu pursed his lips, "You know what? When I was young, I always wished that I was the elder brother."

"But actually thinking about it now, it\'s nothing. Although I\'m not that close to my parents, I\'m close to my grandparents." Shen Fangyu smiled, and said with a bit of self-comfort: "My brother probably doesn\'t Know the story of the tiger skin green pepper."

"And my brother is indeed their good son. He listened to them and went back to city B after graduation. He got married step by step and had children so that they can have grandchildren and enjoy family happiness. Unlike me, I let him They have lost their jobs, they have been fined, and now they have been floating outside, refusing to go home."

"...But they don\'t really care if I go back or not."

His parents didn\'t care about him because they were too negligent in the past. Now that he has grown up, his parents don\'t even have the confidence to dictate. In their care for him now, there is a bit of alienation and politeness that is inevitable after years.

In fact, Shen Fangyu always felt that his parents should regret giving birth to him.

If his parents were given a chance to choose again, there is a high probability that his parents would not give birth to him by chance.

In fact, his brother alone is enough for their family.

Shen Fangyu paused, then smiled faintly, "I don\'t blame my parents either, it\'s because of life."

The pressure of life is always a mountain that young people cannot escape, just like when Shen Fangyu was young in city B looking forward to his parents who were struggling far away in city A, but when he grew up, he went to that city without looking back. It seems that I can never look forward to returning to the city of my relatives.

In the heart of City A that is always full of vitality, there is the blood of countless young people with high morale. Group after group of young people come here to contribute their youth unreservedly to this city, for it Charged to maintain its immortal brilliance.

Then the young people run out of battery, gradually grow old, and the waves wash away the sand. A very small number of people stay, while most of them are eliminated and have to leave.

It was not until a few years later that the grown-up children made a comeback with passion and ideals.

Shen Fangyu thought, this is actually nothing.

The only regret is probably that he obviously has one more relative than other people\'s families, but this road seems to be more lonely than others.

"Hey," Shen Fangyu suddenly said with emotion, "Why did I bring up all these old things?" He pressed the bridge of his nose helplessly, "It\'s been so many years, it seems that I care about it here. Like."

"Jiang Xu," he said, "Just pretend you didn\'t hear it, it\'s too embarrassing—"

Before he finished speaking, Jiang Xu said, "Then I will care about you."

Shen Fangyu suddenly raised his head.

Jiang Xu\'s voice was faint and clear in the night:

"I never thought before that I would live with a...partner who is not my lover, or even live a lifetime."

"But after meeting you, I think maybe it\'s okay."

Jiang Xu said to him: "I will accompany you in the future, and I will care about you."

Shen Fangyu suddenly fell silent.

"What\'s wrong?"

It was hard to see Shen Fangyu\'s expression clearly in the dark, seeing him sitting motionless and not speaking, Jiang Xu reached out to turn on the light.

"Don\'t," Shen Fangyu said, "Don\'t drive."

Jiang Xu\'s fingers froze, and Shen Fangyu\'s voice could hear a little bit of subtle emotion, it seemed a little hoarse.

The bedroom was very quiet, Shen Fangyu turned his face away, not caring that what Jiang Xu said was also a repetition of Ren Miao\'s words.

In fact, before, he originally thought that Ren Han was just an ordinary adolescent rebellious.

Until that day he heard two girls chatting.

He thought, to a certain extent, he actually understood Ren Han quite well, so he could probably guess how moved Ren Han was by what Ren Miao said.

Opening the most secret and secret door in his heart, frankly speaking, at that moment, he was a little envious of Ren Han.

But he really didn\'t expect that someone would say this to him...and that person would be Jiang Xu.

Shen Fangyu felt that his mind was a little confused, but his heart was slightly sour.

The turbulent emotions made Shen Fangyu couldn\'t help summoning up his courage, and asked a question he had always wanted to ask, "Why did you change your mind and decide to keep the child?"

"Because you are soft-hearted?"

Jiang Xu was silent.

Shen Fangyu continued: "Or... is there a little... because of me?"

Jiang Xu remained silent.

When Shen Fangyu glanced at the time on the phone, he probably knew that he was a bit abrupt. He raised his head, forced back the emotion and expectation in his eyes, and smiled reluctantly as if trying to make amends: "It\'s okay, if you don\'t want to answer, you can not say it, no It\'s early, you should go to bed-"

"some."

The wind blew in through the window screen, shaking the thick curtain corners, Jiang Xu looked at him, and suddenly spoke.