Chapter 84
Bai Yu did not answer or react to the apology. She stared at her half-sister with the intention to create pressure. No words were uttered between them.
Silence was a useful tool in exposing secrets. It could be used to force the other party to reconsider their own words and reveal the hidden truths in their thoughts through the feeling of uneasiness. As long as Bai Yu maintained her silence and calmly stared at the other person, she was certain Bai Hua would continue to speak on her own.
Almost one ke passed. Bai Hua had yet to say anything else. There was only the sound of winter breeze, blowing against their bodies. The genius doctor had extraordinarily strong mental fortitude.
But this silence was already enough for Bai Yu to know Bai Hua’s thoughts, to know that she was ready to answer her questions.
“What are you apologizing to me for?” Bai Hua opened her mouth, intending to say something. “If you know what it is, then good. But if you’re still not sure, then go back and reconsider your actions.”
“If I’m not apologizing to you for that thing related to Qin Wang, then what else?” The heroine answered.
Bai Hua gazed at the face of the person who had targeted the original body and forced her through various hardships, almost costing her life, only because she was born with a low status. When she realized her own standing, she wanted to take revenge for everything that this body had been put through. But when she knew that the person in front of her was also transmigrated here...She was resentful, but she was not without judgment. She would not exact revenge on the new Bai Yu who faced the same fate as her.
Still, she felt bitter about her own status. For the genius doctor from the future, this was her main obstacle.
.....
From someone who stood at the top of the pyramid, now had fallen to the lowest point, punished for the crime she did not commit. She had to do everything to climb back up to the spot she had taken, the place she took pride in. She never expected anything that had happened between her and Ouyang Mingxian, and she never thought she would fall for him so deeply that she was unable to suppress her feeling.
In her past life, her parents had raised her to be the first in everything. She had to be clever and to be the number one. When she finally had her job as a doctor, she could rise to the top just as she had wanted. She rarely had to bow her head to anyone. She had forgotten the people who she had hurt on her path to success.
After coming here, Bai Hua was made aware of how lucky she was in her past life to be born in a family that could support her and allow her life to be smooth-sailing. In this life, no matter how intelligent she was, she could only be the daughter of a concubine and nothing more, just as Bai Yu had emphasized often.
But she could not choose her own birth. The only choice she had was in her own path in life, and obviously she would never let herself die along with the word ‘daughter of a concubine’ as her sole label. Women’s duty in this world is only to become mothers, something Bai Hua did not want. She wanted her medical knowledge to be used to the fullest.
Although Bai Hua had a way to fix her lot in life, she could not do anything when it came to Ouyang Mingxian. She knew full well that it would hurt her sister who had loved this man for over ten years, even when she tried to turn away, to stop herself, situations would force them back to meet and become even further entwined. If what they had between them was fate, then Bai Hua did not know how to conquer it anymore.
“So you know what you’re apologizing to me for.” Bai Yu tested Bai Hua to confirm what the other person was thinking during the brief silence between them. Her composure surprised Bai Hua instead.
“You’re not angry with me?”
Not just angry, but I’ll resent and curse you for all lives and eternity after this!
Bai Yu briefly closed her eyes in an attempt to suppress the hatred that filled her chest. Finally, her eyelashes slowly fluttered open, showing the dark eyes like a calm night, reflecting only resolution without a trace of doubt or uncertainty.
“If it was before, I would have wanted to chop you into a thousand pieces, Padma.”
Peach blossom eyes widened at the name she had not heard in a long while. “You-”
“I not only know what’s going to happen to your beloved Qin Wang, but I also know who you were.”
“What are you talking about?”
Padma in Bai Hua’s body stared at the woman who secretly told her about Ouyang Mingxian being ambushed after defeating the snow bandits. At first, she was only surprised, thinking that her sister must have an informant. However, knowing her name from her former life was too unbelievable.
They both transmigrated here. She did not know Bai Yu, but then why did Bai Yu know her?!
“I’m telling you that I can see your fate, and I don’t intend to interfere with it anymore.”
“You...you can see the future?”
“That’s right.”
Bai Yu chose to reveal the truth partially. True, she knew the future, but that future was only limited to the old fate. Right now she did not know how her and Bai Hua’s life would continue to unfold. Still, it was best to declare that she had the upper hand since she never wanted to befriend Bai Hua either way.
Today, she revealed the ambush of Ouyang Mingxian because she wanted to make sure that Bai Hua would be able to save him in time, and so that everything would continue according to the storyline of the series that Bai Yu already knew.
She resented the pair of protagonists, but she never wanted to challenge Bai Hua. The current Bai Yu focused only on challenging herself and growing until she could be recognized by the person up above. Ouyang Feilong’s words from that day were still fresh. This journey might be hard, but if she continued to take small steps, she would someday reach her goal.
She would finally be able to truly let go.
“Then let me ask you one thing.” Bai Hua’s voice became noticeably softer. Bai Yu frowned at her abrupt change, yet still nodded.
“What do you want to know?”
“Will I be able to return to my world? My father, my mother...will I ever see them again? Or am I going to live out my life here?”
Bai Yu never braced herself against this question. She squeezed her hands tight.
While Bai Hua thought of her family, she only thought of hatred, resentment, hopeless love, and wished to change her fate. She left that world without leaving anyone behind, and so she felt no longing like Bai Hua did. That ended up being an advantage in letting her clear her mind much faster.
Bai Hua was different.
Had it not been for her hatred for Song Lianhua who had the same soul and similar appearance to Bai Hua, she would have empathized with a fellow transmigrator.
Bai Yu was luckier than Bai Hua, since she had a clear objective in her new life, and she had partial knowledge of her own future. Their conversation today made her realize that she was not the only one who had to suffer. Everyone had a fate of their own, including their unique frustration for their lot in life. This world was round and vast, humans should not look at it as if it was a single-dimension object.
“Which is it? Will I be able to go back or will I have to stay here forever?”
Bai Yu stared at the other person who was waiting for her answer. “It’s the latter.”
“I...” Bai Hua cast her eyes downward, attempting to hide tears that started brimming. “...I really can’t go back anymore?”
“That’s right.”
“What about you?”
“I’m the same as well. We both have to continue to live here as Bai Yu and Bai Hua, daughters of the Bai family, and die here. Nothing can change that.”
Bai Hua lost all strength in her body. She collapsed heavily to the floor as teardrops fell from the eyes that were once filled with resolve. It was as if all hope was snuffed out of her soul as if all her struggles were rendered meaningless. Why would she become stronger, when she could no longer return to share her success with the people she loved?
Bai Yu looked down at the crumbling woman with pity.
It was a pity for both Bai Hua and herself. That day at the temple when Ouyang Feilong was looking at her crying, what he had seen might be the same as her right now. “Since you cannot go back, then whatever your intent was, keep doing it for good.”
For the person she so loathed...
A villainess like her...could only do this much for them.