BXBX NOVEL Chapter 85 - Past And Scars
If only you knew your worth is not
determined by the way your past shaped you,
leaving these unseen scars on your soul."
(Past and scars.)
---Zhenyi.
---
"You asked me to marry you on such short notice. I did. You asked me not to question you until marriage. I agreed. I almost died on the wedding day. I let it pass. After the wedding, you asked me to follow you to God knows which secluded part of the city. I did without raising any question," She said, now daring him. "But now I expect an explanation of your actions and decisions, which I believe I truly deserve ."
She was his wife for heaven\'s sake!
"I\'m your godddamm wife, Jie, not your assistant who is getting paid to obey your dumb ass." Seeing that he was looking out of the window instead of replying to her, she yelled in frustration.
Zhenyu was certain Long Jie was hiding behind his calm facade, that he was not what he showed the world. The manipulative jerk, the arrogant asshole, and the cold-blooded bastard were not the real him. The real him was concealing himself beneath the various layers he had formed; allowing no one to dig what was there.
But curiosity got the best of her like always.
Zhenyi had made it her mission to peel off his layers, just to find him; the real him. She had no interest in revealing the world his real parts; the chared parts; the sacred parts. It was only for her eyes to see; to observe; to caress.
"As a wife, it is your duty to follow your husband in sickness and health, " Long Jie took a deep breath as he looked out of the window. "And as for why I haven\'t taken you to Long Mansion? It is merely because of the fact that my grandfather and mother are not a big fan of you, my dear wife. Therefore, as a head of the family, isn\'t it my duty to maintain peace in my home? This is why, I decided to live with you here at this mansion," Long Jie said in a very calm tone but Zhenyi could see mocking in his tone. But it was not clear to Zhenyi who this mocking was for.
Long Jie\'s word hit her heart. Even though his back was facing her, she could tell, he deliberately said the hurtful remarks.
"What did you say?" Zhenyi asked him again as if she had misunderstood the meaning of his words even when in her heart she knew she had not misinterpreted his words. But a girl could hope. Right?
"You heard me loud and clear, wife."Long Jie said without bothering to turn around.
Zhenyi heard a loud cracking voice. It was the voice of breaking trust and perhaps, her heart\'s too.
" Good...God... This is sickening. I am such an idiot. I really thought you mean it when you proposed a truce. But you clearly took advantage of my trust again. Didn\'t you?... Why am I such a goddam idiot?" Zhenyi wiped her hand on her face in exasperation.
Was she not even worth his respect? Did he forget the promises he made? Did he remember he had asked her to kill him before he messes up again? Or were those just his words of deception?
"What can you expect of a woman? Hmm..? You keep on trusting me like a good docile wife that you are, and I keep on taking advantage of your trust like a big badass wolf that I\'m."Long Jie turned and faced her, a mocking smile to infuriate Zhenyi was playing on his lips.
Long Jie had pressed on her sore never and he knew it too. She hated when somebody judge her on the basis of her gender and he just took advantage of this fact to rile her up. He could deal with the angry Zhenyi but calm Zhenyi? He couldn\'t.
"You are a big fucking cheat, Long Jie," Zhenyi said searching his face for clues, but there was not any. Either he was very good at acting or he was truly a cheat.
However, Long Jie succeeded in rising her temper.
"Ah, baby too late, you married the cheat. And do you know what? Only a cheat marries another cheat."
A bitter laugh escaped Zhenyi. Her husband was calling her a cheat now. How did it get worse than that?
"I never claimed to be a saint either, husband. I was never a saint and will never be one. But you, Long Jie, you are a goddam liar. What did you say \' honesty and transparency \'? Well, where the heck is honesty and transparency in your case?" Her throat tightened as she thought back to what he said once.
\'Let\'s be honest with each other because it\'s us who have to spend the rest of our lives together.\'
\'A truce\'
\'I don\'t want you to hate me again. Give us a chance for something real this time. Real relationship, real marriage, and maybe friendship.\'
These words that had fucked Zhenyi over.
Zhenyi was not a good woman, and she never claimed to be otherwise. However, she had learned at a young change that the world was not made of white and black only. Somethings were categorized into black and some into white, but no one had ever mentioned the grey areas; the greys where we spent the majority of our lives trying to fit it back into the equation of black and white. Grey zones were deceptive, shunned, and irrevocable. Grey zones-- a transitional zone between good and bad. Grey zones -- the third possibility of seeing the world.
Just like the blackness and whiteness of the world, Long Jie was disregarding the third possibility. He was of the view that Zhenyi would either pity him or be disgusted by him. But the third possibility, the slightest one, was that perhaps, Zhenyi would come to love his scars; the scars he found sickening and plaguing.
A grey zone again.
"Aren\'t you funny, wife? I\'m here being transparent and honest all you want but yet you are not trusting my words, "Long Jie lied.
If he was completely honest, she would ask more questions, more questions would lead to some more and some more would lead to the forbidden territory.
"What secrets are you harboring, Jie? What is so important to you that you will rather keep them than save your marriage? Am I not worthy of asking for what I deserve to know ?" Zhenyi asked as she stood in front of him and started into his eyes but he turned his eyes from hers. In the split moment when her eyes met his grays, he saw the hurt and ache.
Zhenyi was right that she was entitled to the answers, but did he not deserve the peace and solace he had found in her after years of wandering alone?
"Okay, I get it. You don\'t want to answer my questions. I will never ask you again. Heck, I won\'t ask you for anything because you proved it again that our marriage is nothing but a business deal to you. And, I, Xin Zhenyi, will tell you how to do business like a true businesswoman."
"Ah, you are hilarious, wife," Long Jie chuckled.
"No, I just realized I expected too much from a business deal. But you did an incredible job in reminding me," Zhenyi said with a smile.
Betrayal.
She had never tasted betrayal in her life. Unfortunately, it tasted even more bitter Bitrex[1]. She didn\'t wish to taste it again.
"Good. You get it soon. Goodbye, Zhenyi. I will see you at seven in the evening for dinner of course."
"You broke my trust again, Jie?" Her voice cracked.
"For there to be betrayal there would have to be have trust first, Cat eyes," Long Jie whispered but it was audible enough for her, and then he left the room.
Long Jie didn\'t insinuate each and every word he uttered. He wanted nothing but to pull her into his arms and apologize for being an asshole, but he couldn\'t let her burden the weight of his baggage; baggage that was his to carry. So, he left. He left her again just like he did once at Xin mansion.
Because he was afraid, afraid that she would loathe him for what made him the man he was now. He had come to compromise about a fact-- she was his maddest obsession. There was no way he could let her go. He would be dammed before he let her leave him for good. She had to stay in this marriage, with him, and this place.
Even if she loathed him for his obsessive behavior, he would never let her go. Never. He would make sure not to let the shadow of his fucked childhood touch her. And those who were responsible for it was to stay far and far away from their lives.
You must have wondered why Long Jie was so ready to go to any depth for power? Was it simply because he desired it? Or there was any other story? Therefore, the answer was -- those who ruined his childhood deserved to be punished and the only possible way was to destroy each and everything they held dear.
This novel is a contracted work with W e b n o v e l . c o m (remove spaces). If you\'re not reading \'The Typhoon\'s Dangerous Wife \' on W e b n o v e l, it has been stolen. It\'s very heartbreaking to see pirate sites profitting from my hard work. Please support the original author,(tanu_sam).
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[1] Bittrex is the most bitter food in the world. Just like Zhenyi would rather have a bottle of Bittrex than betrayal.
These little poems are written by me. I will be sharing a few with you next chapters.
PS: Thank you for buying the privilege.
Warning: Do not open next chapter at any cost.It is the previous chapter that I warned u about. My CE has moved it last one. I\'m still editing the chapter. I can\'t edit more than 100 words at a time so please wait.