BXBX NOVEL Chapter 129 - "I KNEW IT...I JUST WANTED YOU TO TELL ME!"
FLASHBACK
Shattering sounds of objects intensified inside the room, doors were half-closed and through the periphery, a little girl leaned in to see what was going inside.
It scared her as to how her father was shouting upon her mother who was sitting on the cold floor, expressionless, without moving, her hairs covering her face.
Little Tinsley held her teddy close to her chest as the scene unfolding before her small eyes terrified her.
"You are useless. I m so doomed to have married you. Your father thrashed his burden upon me and now I have to die with it."
Max cursed, kicking off the wooden chair. It fell onto Marshally's hand and tears soaked her eyes but she did not make any sound anymore.
Her mind was full of so many noises that it subsided the voice of her. It was too weak to come out in the world.
"You are ageing. I should have married a young woman instead who is fertile instead of you...I did not cheat till this date, Marshally...tell me why should I not go and get my hair from a mistress??"
He questioned, looking down upon her. She remained unmoving, her head bowed down.
"Tell me why should I not go to another woman instead??"
He implored, holding her hair and making her look up at him. Tinsley gasped when she saw the swollen face of her mother.
Her small heart was crying inside, it was hurting for her mother and wanted to help her but she was too afraid of her father. He resembled the cruel man in her storybooks.
"Why Tinsley is not enough??"
It was the question Marshally would often throw in her husband's way. The males in her and his family always made sure it had to be the man, the breadwinner of the family.
She understood in her time that things were different but now...right now, things had changed so why could not these men too??
Why every time a girl is born, they try for a boy next and not when the boy is born first...they would never try for a girl...just why??
"She is just like you..."
It was what her husband answered, staring right into her red drenched eyes. She did not understand him one bit.
"She is ours...Max. She is ours!"
Marshally raised her voice. She wanted him to love their daughter again just like before everything.
These days, he did not even spare one glance in his own daughter's way and how much it hurt Tinsley...her own father had no clue of it...not any of it.
"But is she, Marshally??"
Max spat back. "Where did the red hairs and blue eyes come from, huh??"
She closed her eyes. How could she explain such a thing to him?? She was not an expert in genetics.
"Ask the maids to clear this mess and be ready for me in five minutes. We will try again."
He declared, about to go out when Anna Maria pulled Tinsley to her side and walked the girl back to her room.
Anna Maria closed the door behind and saw Tinsley tightly holding onto her teddy, scared like a stray kitten.
"Everything will be alright, my child!"
She consoled the little girl, hugging her to her warm chest, rubbing her back, trying to calm her down.
"Why daddy always remains angry at mommy, Anna Maria??"
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"He...he will hate me...hate me for the rest of our lives..."
Tinsley complained, fearing the worst. She was at the most bottom point of her life and would not be able to hold it in if Kian rejected her.
"What if...what if he hates me as daddy did to mother??"
Her question stunned Anna Maria, leaving her speechless. It took her mind back to those olden times.
She had always pitied Marshally, Tinsley's mother. That woman never saw one happy day after her countless miscarriages from her husband and that trauma seemed to have been engraved in Tinsley's mind forever.
Madison saw how disturbed her nana looked so she stood up and let Anna Maria to her room.
After a while, Madison was driving Tinsley back to her home. They did not talk about the incident anymore.
Madison parked the car in front of the building and Tinsley mumbled a small thank you, turning to head out but Madi stopped her.
"You know he loves you?"
Tinsley turned to look back at her.
"He never once said it to me."
She replied, getting hurt by the realization. Madison sighed.
"Sometimes we do not say that we love the person but we actually do in our heart."
Tinsley nodded her head, peeking at Madi's eyes, concerned for her.
"And accidents happen. Not everything works out on the first try. Tell him the truth. He deserves to know, Tinsley."
Madi explained to her. Tinsley's eyes watered expecting the worst from her true confession.
"What if he hates me??"
"Hate you?? Why?? Because you can't control the cycle of life and death??"
Madi tried to make her point with Tinsley. She wanted to give her enough courage to come clean with her husband.
"And if he does...this is your chance to know if he really loves you. If he does, he will comfort you and not hate you."
Tinsley closed her eyes, letting Madi's words sink inside of her. She smiled at Madi and turned to head out.
"I know he loves you and we are always here."
Madi concluded. She pulled her for a warm hug before letting go. Tinsley waited outside until the car disappeared from her sight.
With heavy shoulders, she climbed up the stairs. Her mind screaming, yelling at her. Her heart crying in fear.
Her inside was a mess. It was still mourning for her lost baby and at the same time, crying in fear for having to confess the truth out.
But it was necessary. She knew it was what she had to do if she needed to move on.
She needed to come clean. She was tired of hiding the truth. She was tired of having to cry, mourn and wail for the loss of their child all by herself.
She needed him...her husband, her man by her side, to pull her from this dark cave with no light to move on.
When she opened the door of their apartment, she saw him, sitting on the sofa, staring at the laptop on the table before.
He turned to look at her. She gave him a genuine smile, standing still on the threshold of the door. He returned the smile back to her.
She closed the door behind her and with small steps, came closer to him and sat beside him.
She caught hold of his hand, running circles on the backside of his palm. He let her and just observed her, silently.
"I need to tell you something."
Tinsley said, tilting her head up to glance at her husband. His grey eyes bored into her blue ones.
"I had a miscarriage."
She let out, looking right into his eyes and he remained unmoved. It was scaring her from inside but she continued.
"We lost our child."
A strand of hot tear flushed out of her eyes as she spoke those words out.
"I could not...could not carry it inside of me...safe."
And she broke down at last. Her strong face faded off. Kian was quick to pull her into him...in his arms, not being able to see her that broken.
"You tried all you could, baby."
He mumbled, rubbing her back as she cried her heart out onto his chest, soaking his t-shirt.
"I knew it...I just wanted you to tell me."
Kian said and it made Tinsley cry harder knowing that just like her, he was too hurting her, silently.
She raised her head up from his chest to peek at him. She cupped his face in between her hands.
"We will get through this...together."
She asserted and he nodded in positive. He pecked her lips, and both rested their foreheads on each other, closing their eyes.
"Yes, we will...together always!"
He said and they both remained like that for as long as they wanted to, this time mourning for their loss together, grieving for the dead soul.
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Madison drove back to her house and saw Lana, sitting by the porch, waiting for her lover.
She stood up when Madi got out of the car and walked up to her. They both engulfed each other in a tight hug.
"Your nana was quite devastated. I put her to sleep."
Lana said as they both sat on the patio, under the starry sky, watching the full moon.
"She is your nana too."
Madi uttered and Lana smiled, nodding. She leaned onto Madi's shoulder and Madi wrapped her arms around her.
"It is a mystery how good she was concealing everything...every hurt inside of her for so long, right??"
Madi nodded at Lana's question.
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