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Ilyin felt herself becoming light after a while. Her body told her she was waking up and going back to the harsh winter; she did not want to return.

***

Ilyin blinked her eyes at the white light coming from the ceiling. It had always been dark enough to sleep. However, it was bright enough to show that the familiar ceiling had not been refurbished since she was seven. She had been afraid of severe winds, as the shadows made by the light moved on the stripped wallpaper frightened her. She had also been afraid of people, as the shadows shook whenever the door slammed. Ilyin stood up.

“The master wants to see you,” a maid said as the door opened, and Ilyin turned around in disbelief. She’d recognized the voice of the maid who had spoken because she was the one who had served her the most. The only reason the maid did so though, was because she was the newest maid there and it was obvious that she didn’t like her mistress.

“Lady?”

Ilyin thought of those from the Delroses when she heard that word. They had spoken with worry whenever they called her, but this maid’s voice sounded bitter.

“Oh…” Ilyin felt herself speak as her voice rang in her ear. She looked at the window to see a broad-leafed tree that didn’t grow in the wintry lands and thought of Biflten in summer, which had been much more colorful and vibrant. The sunlight faded in the dirt, and Ilyin covered her mouth as she coughed. It was all so realistic.

“Lady!” The maid slapped the bed, and Ilyin looked at her in surprise.

“Won’t you go?”

“I will,” Ilyin spoke without realizing it, and she noticed that she was wearing a formal dress instead of her nightgown. She knew that she wouldn’t sleep in something like this.

“You cannot act like this in front of the master, all right?” The corridors of the Arlen Estate were strange and tepid compared to where she had been. “You have to answer questions!” As if the maid were speaking to herself, she added, “How prideful is she after being divorced.” The maid brought her head closer, and Ilyin reeled back in surprise.

Ilyin heard the maid’s words loud and clear and it felt as if someone had stabbed her in the chest. However, she thought of the sights she had seen in Biflten, surely they hadn’t all been dreams. She had become Ilyin de Biflten in marriage, spent nights with him, and finished the succession ceremony. She clearly remembered the Mille’s Divine Object, that fresh red bloom, and the hand that had covered it, lest she fell asleep. Therefore, Ilyin decided to think that this was a bad nightmare.

The maid led her up the stairs, and she thought that the mansion looked small and old now. She had thought the mansion looked much bigger before. Ilyin looked around as she followed the maid, and everything was the same as it had been when she’d left.

“Come here, now.” The maid was insolent, and her eyes were filled with hate. As they walked, people jumped back like they would be cursed by a mere touch from her. They were all familiar sights. She felt a pang of fear again but she was okay for now.

“Master, I have brought her.”

“Let her in.”

Ilyin stood in front of Viscount Arlen’s room, and as the maid went away after the door opened, Ilyin was left to face him alone.

“It has been a long time since I saw you,” the Viscount said indifferently.

Ilyin thought that he still didn’t welcome her and replied bluntly, “Yes.”

“So, did you tell the Duke your secret?”

The Viscount didn’t even offer her a seat, and she remembered that it had always been like this here. Ilyin grabbed her dress defensively, “What do you mean?”

“I heard that you were divorced. There would be only one reason for that.” The Viscount talked of how fitting their family was and went on about their long history for a while before looking at her directly, “You spoke about how your dreams told the future, right?”

Ilyin wanted to say that that wasn’t true. She had told Aden about her dream but she wanted to correct something else. She wanted to tell her father that she was not divorced, and even if she was, it had not been due to her dreams. She wanted to tell him that she was not cursed, even if she was only in a dream.

Ilyin had not known before that she could feel this passionate about something, as words she had suppressed all her life came bubbling to the surface. She wanted to say she did not see only death. If she hadn’t seen that avalanche, many knights would have been injured or killed. They had been able to avoid that. Ilyin wanted to say that she was not cursed, but her lips would not open, even in a dream.