BXBX NOVEL Chapter 91
That’s right... Joowan Kim and Jihoon Kang were supposedly meeting each other once a month while Siwoo was dating Joowan. It wasn’t a coincidence that Siwoo found Jihoon’s name on the reservation list. Was Siwoo even supposed to see the list?
But one thing was clear here; Jihoon Kang didn’t know Joowan Kim. At least, not until Woojin Choi took him to this restaurant last week. Joowan looked like he was about to cry. The skin underneath his eyes were turning red.
They dated for a long time, and it was ironic how Siwoo was just finding out how Joowan really was after they broke up. Siwoo bit his lips hard and opened his mouth.
“Jihoon Kang.”
“...”
“This has nothing to do with you.”
Even without facing Jihoon, Siwoo could feel Jihoon’s face crumbling into devastation. Jihoon was a proud person, but he also had low self-esteem. He was a very anxious person, and Siwoo knew this very well. Siwoo understood because he was the same. This was why he had been trying to avoid dating Jihoon for a while.
Joowan breathed a little easier and turned towards Siwoo. The familiar stare for some reason made Siwoo feel a little afraid. Siwoo realized that Joowan probably had many more faces that he never imagined. It was only now that Siwoo realized he didn’t know his ex very well while they were dating.
Siwoo said slowly, “Jihoon, go home.”
“Siwoo...”
“I will be there after I’m done here. I will go to your house afterward.”
Just then, Joowan grabbed Siwoo’s wrist. Unlike when Jihoon held his wrist, Siwoo pushed Joowan away without hesitation and turned to hold Jihoon’s hand instead. Jihoon, who had been frowning so far, slowly began to smile. Seeing Jihoon like this made Siwoo smile as well, though he stopped himself quickly.
Siwoo continued, “I will be there soon.”
The two men surrounding Siwoo had opposite reactions. Siwoo touched Jihoon’s back affectionately. When he caressed the exact spot he grabbed last night during sex, Jihoon’s neck reddened immediately. Siwoo found it so cute that he couldn’t help smiling.
Joowan watched this interaction in shock. He asked, “Are you guys together?”
“Yes.”
Jihoon was walking away but he stopped when Siwoo answered without hesitation. Siwoo planned on letting Jihoon know about his decision regarding their relationship much later, but because of Joowan, he ended up blurting it out. But even so, Siwoo didn’t dislike his decision.
Joowan asked, “What?”
“It is you who has nothing to do with me, Joowan. Not anymore. The only reason I am talking to you right now is to let you know that we will never be together again.”
“... Siwoo...”
“Stop saying my name and answer me. Since when have you been lying to me?”
“...”
“Since when?”
“...”
“If you aren’t going to answer me, that’s fine.”
Siwoo knew Jihoon Kang was within reach. All he wanted to do right now was to give plenty of chances to Joowan to tell the truth. But Joowan refused to answer him, and it was a huge disappointment. Siwoo was certain that Joowan would at least show even a little bit of honesty to him. Siwoo felt like an idiot.
“What do you mean ‘fine?’”
“Do you remember what you told me before?”
“...”
“You once said to me that if we ever split, I am the type that would never see you again. That this made you nervous.”
“...”
“You were right, Joowan. Now that we are over, we will never see each other again.”
“Siwoo... I...”
He turned around, away from him. Joowan was a caring partner, but Siwoo now knew that it wasn’t enough. He also knew there was so much of Joowan he didn’t know about. Joowan grabbed his wrist again, but Siwoo quickly pulled back. It was strange how Siwoo no longer felt pain in his heart. Perhaps it was because he knew Jihoon was waiting nearby in his car.
Suddenly, Joowan finally admitted, “Siwoo, you are right. At first, I did approach you for a reason. I did have an ulterior motive.”
“...”
Siwoo stopped in his tracks as Joowan continued, “But as I got to know you, everything changed. What I felt for you was real. I never knew you would end up seeing that reservation list.”
“It doesn’t matter now.”
“... Siwoo!”
Siwoo continued to walk away. He wanted to cover his ears so he didn’t have to hear Joowan’s voice anymore. His hand covered his forehead as he felt weak when he noticed Jihoon on the street. Siwoo thought he would be waiting in his car, but Jihoon was right there.
People walked by and the cars passed by, but all Siwoo could see was Jihoon’s face. Jihoon was looking back with a relaxed but slightly nervous look on his face.
Jihoon mouthed the words, “Come to me.”
Without hesitation, without thinking, Siwoo began to run towards him. He quickly became breathless and Siwoo wasn’t sure if it was because he was running or if it was because of Jihoon.
When he reached Jihoon, Siwoo muttered, “... I told you to go ahead home without me.”
“Did you really think I would leave you here alone?”
“... Jihoon Kang.”
When Siwoo reached out for him, Jihoon hugged him tightly. Siwoo could hear Jihoon’s breath in his ear, and he realized that Jihoon was panting as well. Had Jihoon been worrying about him?
Jihoon seemed nonchalant and indifferent, but Siwoo was learning that he was, in fact, a very caring and sensitive person. Sometimes, his considerate nature caused Jihoon to act in an obsessive way, but somehow, Siwoo felt moved by it.
“Siwoo Jung, you have a bad taste in men.”
“That must be why I chose you.”
Jihoon smirked and replied, “Let’s go home now.”
His gentle voice was more than enough to soothe Siwoo’s broken heart.