BXBX NOVEL Chapter 86
“What does it mean when you say your body is burning for me?”
Shin liked to ask questions he already knew the answers to. He also liked to pretend to Woojin that he didn’t understand what was said, even though he did. During the few months they dated, Woojin learned that Shin was the type that didn’t give details unless asked specifically. Shin also liked to not give answers easily. Some may have not liked this trait in a lover, but strangely, Woojin found it cute.
Through the phone, Woojin could hear Shin’s sticky breath. Woojin whispered, “Should we video chat?”
Woojin wanted to see Shin’s face. Shin Kim was an expressive and vivid man, but when he became excited, Shin’s face often turned cold and indifferent. This little secret always made Woojin feel excited. Oddly, Shin’s cold face looked mean somehow, and it made Woojin tremble with lust. Even now, Woojin felt his heart beating loudly. He tried to breathe as quietly as possible; he didn’t want Shin to find out that he was excited.
“Okay.”
Woojin pressed the facetime button and waited quietly. Within a few seconds, Shin’s face appeared on the screen. He looked pale, so Woojin asked, “Is your room cold?”
“Why do you ask?”
“Your face looks almost blue.”
Woojin’s frown must’ve looked funny, because Shin laughed. Shin was wearing a thick navy hoodie. He replied, “You know what? You look so disappointed right now.”
Slowly, Woojin touched his phone screen with his finger. Shin tilted his head in confusion and asked, “What are you doing?”
“I thought I might be able to feel you if I touched the screen...”
Shin’s face turned cold again. Woojin wondered why Shin always tried to hide his excitement or happiness. Sometimes, Shin treated Woojin like he was fragile. Woojin didn’t like this at all. He wasn’t fragile or weak. He grew up in a cold family, and it only made him stronger.
Woojin whispered, “Do you want to touch me too?”
Shin closed his lips firmly and Woojin wondered, ‘Why does he remain so still?’ Woojin thought of what part of Shin Kim’s body he liked.
His neck that bent backward during sex.
His Adam’s apple that bobbed.
His eyelids that looked like they were vibrating.
Shin’s round and kind eyes that sometimes turned sharp like those of a beast.
Clear skin and beautiful lips.
Whenever Woojin touched Shin’s lips, they were moist and sticky. Shin laughed at such an affectionate gesture. Shin liked to touch Woojin’s bare chest and grab his waist hard. Shin loved caressing Woojin’s hip.
Shin’s hands were huge, and his fingers were long. They way they touched Woojin made him feel hot. Shin replied, “I want to hang up.”
“Why?”
Woojin’s voice split, making Shin look up at him. He stared at Woojin for a long time, and Woojin’s desire exploded.
Was it just him who felt this way?
Woojin asked, “Do you think something’s wrong with me?”
“Why do you ask?”
“Just looking at you like this makes me so happy.”
It was a contrary statement. Truthfully, Woojin felt desperate to touch Shin. He wanted to possess Shin Kim. He was obsessed with Shin. The weekly therapy he had was like a confession session to Woojin. His doctor listened quietly without making any suggestions or offering any medications. She just listened to him and sometimes, she talked about herself as well. It was surprisingly comfortable and pleasant. Minji even told Woojin that he could even use stronger language during their sessions.
Minji said to him, “You can even swear if you want.”
“Pardon?”
“When I get angry, I sometimes curse very loudly.”
“...”
“You know, the f-word.”
“Huh? Are you serious?”
Woojin burst into loud laughter. He laughed for a long time because he found Minji hilarious. Minji and Shin were very alike. Minji told Woojin, “Everyone makes mistakes.”
“...”
“Even if you make the worst mistake, you can always apologize for it.”
“...”
“But if you feel like it can’t be forgiven, then I guess you don’t have to apologize. Don’t you agree?”
Woojin felt consoled by this funny doctor. No one ever talked to him so frankly yet helpfully before. Perhaps Woojin read these similar words before in books in the past, but they felt meaningful only because of the person who said them.
Minji’s attitude was what assured Woojin the most. She was very serious, but she still made him feel comfortable. Her smiles were genuine, and her eyes told him that she truly understood him because she went through similar things. Her lips looked kind and when she talked, Woojin felt like he could be honest with her. It was a strange and amazing thing. Talking freely about himself... The things he could never bring himself to talk about...
When Woojin took a deep breath, Shin finally reacted. He said to Woojin, “The reason why I want to hang up now is...”
“Yeah?”
“Because I feel desperate to feel you right now. I want to take you this very moment.”
Woojin’s heart was about to jump out from his chest. He remembered the feeling of Shin’s rough hands touching him all over his body.
Woojin murmured, “I don’t think I am going to be able to get any sleep at all tonight...”
***
Jihoon said to Siwoo, “This is the first time you asked me out.”
Siwoo rarely asked anyone out for dinner on a weekday. He was a very social person, but the main source of the stress for him at work was dealing with other people. So after work, he usually needed time for himself to rest.
But today was an exception. He wanted to drink tonight, but he didn’t want to drink alone. He wanted someone to be there for him. And tomorrow, he had a meeting in the afternoon. His work hours were flexible, which meant that he could take tomorrow morning off.
So after work, Siwoo asked Jihoon out to a pub in Jongro where his acquaintances rarely frequented. Even as he sent Jihoon the text, Siwoo secretly hoped that Jihoon would reject him.
But his wish was not granted. Jihoon agreed to meet him for dinner.
When they met, Siwoo said to him in annoyance, “I know this place is too far from your work. You know you didn’t have to say yes.”
“I wanted to, since you never ask me out.”
Jihoon’s eyes looked unusually dark as he stared at Siwoo. Siwoo stared back, and after a few minutes, he realized that he was falling for Jihoon.
This was very bad.
With a sigh, Siwoo looked away. Jihoon muttered, “You were the one who asked me out, and now you are sighing at me. How rude.”
“It’s my specialty. A hobby perhaps.”
“Then perhaps the problem here is me since I am the weirdo who finds someone like you attractive.”
Jihoon’s hands felt hot on the back of Siwoo’s hands. He couldn’t breathe, so Siwoo looked away. The bartender walked towards them, but when he saw Jihoon’s hands covering Siwoo’s, he walked away quietly.
“Jihoon, remove your hands from mine.”
With an odd smile, Jihoon reached to touch Siwoo’s nose affectionately. He was clearly making fun of Siwoo, but all Siwoo could do was blush. Ignoring Jihoon as best as he could, Siwoo called for the bartender.
The bartender walked towards them, wiping a glass, and asked Siwoo, “Do you want what you had the last time? Hendrick’s gin & tonic?”
“Oh, you remember.”
When Siwoo smiled pleasantly at the bartender, Jihoon frowned. Siwoo noticed it, but he ignored it and poked Jihoon a few times to order quickly. Jihoon shook his head and stretched before answering, “I’m not going to drink.”
“What? Why not? This is a pub!”
“Please get us some cheese, crackers, and olives. And some lemonade too.”
Siwoo studied Jihoon, who was playing with his cigarette pack. Jihoon looked almost unforgettable; he had classic features and he looked like a typical “nice guy.” Shin Kim looked gorgeous but easy-going, while Jihoon looked nice but a little cruel. He had dark eyebrows, eyes that strangely looked sad when he smiled, and a body that Siwoo suspected was lean and muscular.
Jihoon was definitely Siwoo’s type. Siwoo’s favorite outfit on Jihoon was the black turtleneck that hung tightly around his broad shoulders. It made Siwoo salivate with lust.
Siwoo asked, “I thought you don’t smoke.”
“I don’t.”
“Then why do you carry around the cigarette pack?”
“Because you do.”