Chapter 271 - Bleeding Heart
His thoughts were distorted while he felt dizzy. He took deep breaths to calm himself but it didn’t work. He drove around the city aimlessly. From the morning till the sunset, he kept wandering around and when he parked the car, Xin Xiamu realized he was under Yu Kim’s condominium building.
Closing his eyes briefly, he mustered up his courage and went up to the 8th floor. Ringing the doorbell, he waited patiently.
The door was pulled open to reveal Yu Kim’s small figure wearing an oversized sweatshirt along with shorts. "Xiamu! What brought you here?" She was pleasantly surprised by his sudden visit and seeing the sullen look on his face, she felt strange. "Is everything okay?"
Yu Kim gave him a way to enter and he walked inside the apartment with a heavy heart. "Yeah! Everything is okay. I just wanted to see you. Is there something wrong with wanting to meet my best friend at this time?"
Yu Kim smiled at him and replied, "Obviously not! I just never saw that serious expression on your face. So, it kinda scared me a bit."
Xin Xiamu tried to pass a smile but it came out rather stiff. He sat down on the couch while Yu Kim brought some water for him and sat opposite him with her laptop in her lap. Clearly, she was busy but Xin Xiamu wasn’t planning on disturbing her work. He sat there silently observing her expressions.
"Kimmi, do you know what Qiao Ge’s allergic to?" Xin Xiamu decided to go roundabout since he didn’t have the courage to ask straightforwardly.
"Hmm..." She didn’t lift her eyes from the laptop screen and answered, "He’s not allergic to anything as such but he has some grudge against peanuts."
"Do you remember what I’m allergic to?" He asked again and secretly hoped that she did but he wasn’t very lucky today.
"Mmmm... I can’t seem to recall." She kept scratching her head trying to remember but to no avail.
"What do you think about me as a person?" He asked another question.
"Xiamu, you’re my best friend. Obviously, you’re the best. Also, you’re such a nice and caring guy that I sometimes think that your future wife would be damn lucky. You’re successful and handsome, come from a beautiful family. What else one can ask for?" Yu Kim replied in a single breath but she didn’t know that her words made Xin Xiamu feel bitter in his heart. She evaluated him like he was a stranger.
"What about Qiao Ge?" It took a bit of struggle to get his voice back.
Yu Kim looked up from the screen and sighed out. "He is... amazing?" She chuckled lightly and said, "Were you expecting something like this? No way! I won’t say it at all! He’s the biggest jerk I have ever come across in my life. He’s bossy and domineering. A total tyrant. Super picky with his clothes." Her face softened as continued to say, "But that’s what makes him so different and real. I can see the way he loves his mother and you can’t even fathom his love for his best friends. In short, he’s perfect!"
Xin Xiamu felt his heart bleeding but he couldn’t even dare to shift his expressions. While he was dying inside, he had to look at her with a beautiful smile on his face.
"Kimmi, do you love my cousin?" He couldn’t believe that the question actually came out of his mouth but he couldn’t deny the fact. He was the one who had spoken.
Yu Kim was startled as she averted her gaze. "I’m your best friend. At least, I never thought you’d hide this from me." He had figured the answer already from her demeanor, what was he doing? Perhaps, his heart still was in denial.
"I love him but he doesn’t love me at all." Xin Xiamu was stunned to hear her voice that seemed to be piercing his heart. "He always either avoids me or runs away from me. I don’t want to force him but he doesn’t even want me to be close to him anymore. And it’s hurting now." Seeing the tears in her eyes, he came close to her and patted her head.
"I think you’re wrong. I know my cousin. If he has let you stay with him for this long then that means he feels something for you. He’s a bit dense in the PDA department." he was trying to comfort her.
Today, he realized another thing; there was nothing more painful than watching the one you love cry before you for another person. It was tormenting!
"I hope you’re right. Because I thought I’ll be fine staying close to him but now, the idea of seeing him with another person is scaring me." Her anxious expression made it difficult for Xin Xiamu to breathe.
As her childhood friend, Xin Xiamu stayed for an hour comforting her before leaving her apartment and when he got in his car, his restraint was broken as he dropped his head on the steering wheel with ragged breathing and tear-filled eyes. He wanted to talk to someone but he couldn’t since there was nobody whom he could tell that his own fiancee has just told him how much she loves his cousin.