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Chapter 241.2: Even If My Life Is Filled With Tears (2)

He was in nonstop pain and had horrible hallucinations.

Kang Chul-Gyu knew that he was finally home, but that didn’t stop him from seeing the Spetsnaz, the White Wolves, and the North Korean military officers rushing toward him.

He had to survive the fight.

By the time he was done fighting for his life, his wife and young son were already on the ground, covered in blood and crying. His child didn’t even know that his father used to be a soldier, yet Kang Chul-Gyu still couldn’t find the time to feel even a hint of guilt.

All he could do was hope that the pain would stop and that he would be able to escape from this hell.

I’m sorry, honey. I’m sorry, Channy.

Kang Chul-Gyu sighed softly.

While his wife wasn’t around, Kang Chul-Gyu went to the kitchen and took a knife. He was in his right mind at the time, but he still couldn’t stop thinking that he didn’t want to be a burden anymore.

Screech.

His wife remained calm even when she opened the door and saw the knife in his hand.

“Please don’t do this,” his wife softly said. She quietly reached over and took the knife. Her hands were covered in callouses due to her work.

“Please keep living even if you have to rely on alcohol and drugs. I’ll endure this for as long as I can. I was proud of you.”

Of all things, why did he remember how his wife looked when she visited him in the middle of his difficult training sessions and her eyes and white teeth when she smiled brightly at him?

Even though she told him to live, the last memory he had of her was her hanging on the ceiling.

His wife fell into a trap where she couldn’t do anything. She probably wanted to tell Kang Chul-Gyu to come to his senses and that their son became a soldier and died in some foreign country.

That day, Kang Chul-Gyu stopped drinking and getting high on drugs. He offered his neck to the hallucination that rushed toward him every night.

‘Kill me! Please kill me!’

However, after some time, the hallucinations would disappear, leaving him alone with pain even more horrible than before.

“There’s lead inside the back of your head, and it has probably started to rust. You’re lucky you’re still alive,” a doctor said, then shook his head. “Unfortunately, it’s embedded in an area that’s too dangerous to operate in.”

***

Kang Chul-Gyu sharply scanned their enemies.

Kang Chan had entrusted him with this task.

For some reason, Kang Chan’s smile and eyes made Kang Chul-Gyu wonder if his son would look like Kang Chan if he was still alive. Kang Chul-Gyu even felt as if he was talking to his kid as he apologized and as Kang Chan told him to make an excuse for his actions.

The Spetsnaz? The Russian Mafia?

Sons of bitches. You dare target Kang Chan in my presence? You little chicks wouldn’t know about me, but your superiors probably remember the Korean words ‘DMZ King.’

Kang Chul-Gyu smirked as he sharply looked ahead.

Kang Chan was so skilled that Kang Chul-Gyu couldn’t do anything for him.

Hence, even if their enemies had the capability to kill Kang Chan, Kang Chul-Gyu decided that he would not back down. Kang Chan was the most reliable person he knew when it came to finding his son’s remains and mementos.

***

Kim Tae-Jin sat on the sofa in the barracks and raised his head to look at Kang Chan, who was sitting across from him. The satellite video receiver wasn’t picking up anything in their surroundings.

“It’s not showing anything. Shouldn’t we assume that our enemies don’t have any supporting units that would follow up their initial attack?” Kim Tae-Jin asked.

“This means they’re going to attack us at night.”

Kim Tae-Jin looked unconvinced.

“They’re just stalling long enough to tire us out. Once we’re overcome with fatigue, some other group will launch a night raid,” Kang Chan added.

“Are you sure about this?”

“You’re going to get your answer at night.”

“If that’s the case, we should ask for help!”

Kang Chan shook his head. “If we contact anyone right now, the Mongolian border control will definitely come here. If they cooperate with the mafia, we’ll be wiped out.”

Kim Tae-Jin looked surprised. He seemed to be demanding further explanations, but he chose not to say anything.

“Everything will make sense when you factor in the reason they ran away this morning and why Vasili used those fuckers to try forming an agreement with us. If the Mongolian border control approaches us, we won’t be able to shoot them on sight. If they unleash chaos once they’re inside the base, we won’t have any chance against them,” Kang Chan explained.

“They would do that even though China and Russia are watching?”

“They’ll just blame everything on the mafia. The Mongolian border control will be satisfied with taking everything worth any money here.”

“Phew! I was too naive,” Kim Tae-Jin replied.

“No matter the place, this happens often in combat.”

“Does it happen in Africa too?”

Kang Chan nodded.

“I’m going to die from hwabyeong[1] someday because of how curious I am about your identity,” Kim Tae-Jin complained.

“We have to get through today first for that to happen.”

Kim Tae-Jin laughed, finding Kang Chan’s answer absurd. Looking at him, he asked, “Is there a way to defeat them?”

Kang Chan didn’t reply, but Kim Tae-Jin believed his fiercely glinting eyes were more than enough to answer his question.

***

‘I’ll spare no effort in finding you and having you rest next to your mom,’ Kang Chul-Gyu thought, making a promise to his son as he glared at their enemies.

He couldn’t help but want to apologize to his son for liking Kang Chan, whom he felt as was walking over him in his son’s stead. He was glad that his son met someone who would get angry about his death as if it were his business.

Kang Chul-Gyu’s gaze on their enemies sharpened further as he got rid of all useless thoughts and feelings.

This was one of the Spetsnaz’s old-fashioned tactics. They would send an advance party to engulf their opponents in chaos and put them on edge for an entire day. At night, reinforcements would go around the back and invade their opponents’ positions.

So much time has passed. Why are they still using this old-fashioned?

Kang Chul-Gyu discretely looked behind him.

Their base was in the middle of nowhere. It looked so out of place that it seemed as if someone just randomly dropped it here.

‘It’s happening tonight.’

Their enemies would definitely raid them once darkness had fallen.

No matter how much he explained it to others, they wouldn’t understand how it felt to have a heart that pounded to warn him of danger.

Kang Chan also appeared to have instinctively realized that their enemies would be raiding them soon, which was probably why he was trying to check the satellite video.

They were going to put an end to this whole situation tonight.

If so, then Kang Chul-Gyu had to do whatever it took to get rid of the Spetsnaz as cruelly as possible. That would demoralize their enemies enough to make them give up or open up negotiations.

He would fight relentlessly until Kang Chan and Kim Tae-Jin found his son’s remains or mementos. It didn’t matter if he died. Kim Tae-Jin would bury his son near his wife anyway.

Kang Chul-Gyu never got to see his superior again after he was imprisoned.

I hope he’s not upset. Is he still even alive?

The man was probably dead already. He smoked too much.

After tonight’s battle, Kang Chul-Gyu hoped that Kang Chan would finally agree to help him find his son.

This was his first time seeing a real soldier since he was given a dishonorable discharge.

If someone like him was around back then...

He shook his head.

Considering his superior couldn’t protect him at the time, Kang Chan probably would’ve just been kicked out from the military in a similar manner as well.

Kang Chul-Gyu suddenly wanted to see his son. He didn’t care if his son swore at him or slapped him in front of a crowd if it meant he would get to see him just one more time.

Clank! Taang!

Kang Chul-Gyu held up his rifle as fast as lightning and pulled the trigger.

The enemy sniper who was lifting his gun to shoot hurriedly lowered his head. The South Korean team looked at Kang Chul-Gyu with surprise.

Kang Chul-Gyu smirked.

Now that you’ve lowered your head, stay like that at least until this evening... at least until Kang Chan finishes planning out the operation.

Kang Chul-Gyu glanced behind him, feeling as if Kang Chan would know the meaning behind the shot he just made.

Did you bastards want to get on our nerves?

Clank! Taang!

The enemy in front of one of the vehicles taunted them but soon wobbled and fell to the ground. From the way he behaved, he was likely hoping to provoke them, which proved to be a fatal mistake. .

How can Kang Chan shoot them in the forehead from this distance, though?

Kang Chul-Gyu thought it was just a coincidence at first, but the fight this morning made him realize that it was all intentional.

Whoosh! Whoosh!

The final battle would be tonight.

Badum badum. Badum badum.

Kang Chul-Gyu looked around him. His heart was beating like crazy, sending him multiple warnings that he had to get out of this place.

However, he paid it no heed.

Kang Chul-Gyu would protect at least Kang Chan and Kim Tae-Jin tonight even if it cost him his life. He would make sure that they could bury his son’s mementos near his wife in his stead.

He could end up meeting his son tonight, but it would be meaningless. After all, he lived a life of blood and tears just to die on a battlefield in Mongolia’s wilderness, surrounded by rough winds.

Kang Chul-Gyu smirked.

1. Korean somatization disorder, a mental illness which arises when people are unable to confront their anger as a result of conditions which they perceive to be unfair. Hwabyeong is known as a Korean culture-bound syndrome ?