宅男的天堂

Gu Jiao brought the child back to the room for a check-up, but found nothing wrong.

Having lived two lives, she’d seen people faint at the sight of blood, faint at the sight of a needle, but this was the first time she’d seen someone faint at the sight of meat. Truly, you live and learn.

The others were also surprised, but upon hearing the young fellow snoring, they knew he was fine.

When Xiaojingkong woke up, the meat on the table was gone. He leaned over the table and burst into tears!

“My meat! My meat! My meat…”

Everyone: It’s not that we didn’t leave any meat for you, it’s that you simply can’t eat it.

Comforting others wasn’t Gu Jiao’s strong suit, so the old lady personally stepped in. She had deceived the world’s most powerful people before; a little kid was nothing to her!

In a short while, the old lady had comforted and quieted him.

After leaving the old lady’s room, Xiaojingkong went to Gu Jiao’s room and tearfully said to Gu Jiao, “The meat said it doesn’t want to be eaten by me.”

Gu Jiao was flabbergasted: “Ah… it doesn’t want to be eaten by you…”

With teary eyes, Xiaojingkong bravely said, “Granny said it was because I’m still too small. When I grow up, it will be willing to be eaten by me.”

Gu Jiao was completely impressed by her Granny’s wit. Who could think of such an excuse? She must have deceived many people before, right?

The old lady couldn’t remember clearly either. She only vaguely felt that she had indeed deceived quite a lot of people, both more and less powerful than her, all fooled by her convincingly.

After Xiao Liulang bathed Xiaojingkong, he, wearing his little pajamas, returned to Xiao Liulang’s, umm, scratch that, his own room!

Having cleaned herself, Gu Jiao was also preparing to rest.

At this moment, Xiaojingkong walked over with a small pillow.

“What’s wrong?” Gu Jiao looked at him, “Are you feeling unwell somewhere?”

Xiaojingkong opened his watery eyes wide: “My bed says it doesn’t want me to sleep on it tonight.”

Gu Jiao was struck, why did that sound so familiar?

Could it be… he’s taken a piece of faulty logic and applied it elsewhere?

Gu Jiao crossed her arms: “Your bed didn’t say that.”

Xiaojingkong: “It did.”

Gu Jiao: “It didn’t; It can’t talk.”

Standing straight, Xiaojingkong said, “How does Jiaojiao know it can’t talk? Even my meat can talk, so my bed should be able to as well!”

Gu Jiao: “…” I’m speechless and can’t argue against that.

Gu Jiao sternly went to find the old lady.

Whoever indoctrinated him with this faulty logic should fix it!

The old lady promptly bolted the door, laid down on the bed and covered her head with the quilt: “I’m sleeping! I’m sleeping!”

Gu Jiao: “…”

It’s not right to be so irresponsible. After deceiving the boy, you don’t even provide after-sales service. Bad review!

Gu Jiao wouldn’t use force on a small child, so she eventually took Xiaojingkong back to her own room.

Xiao Liulang didn’t say a word throughout.

Xiaojingkong, with a victorious little expression, waved at Xiao Liulang: “I’m going to sleep in the main room tonight then! Don’t miss me too much!”

Xiaojingkong, gleefully hugging his pillow, bounced around on Gu Jiao’s bed for a while, tired himself out and fell asleep.

If Xiaojingkong thought he could sleep with Gu Jiao all night like this, then he was too naive.

As soon as he fell asleep, Xiao Liulang came over with his walking stick and unceremoniously lifted him back to the main room.

No scheme is the deepest scheme, your brother-in-law is still your brother-in-law!

When Xiaojingkong woke up and found himself lying on the bed in the main room, he went through an expected bout of heartbreak!

He felt his sleep was wasted!!!

Of course, he would never think it was because Jiaojiao didn’t want him – anyone could guess he was sneaked back into the room by someone!

Despite Xiaojingkong usually being understanding, he couldn’t hold it in this time. He looked up, yelled and kicked his legs, crying loudly, “Bad brother-in-law! Bad brother-in-law! He stole a child! He snuck me over in the middle of the night! He’s a kidnapper!”

The old lady, who was eating melon seeds in the main hall, was so startled that she spilled her seeds!

Kidnapper? Is that how you use it?

Xiao Liulang had gone to school, Gu Jiao had gone to pick mountain products, and the house was left to Xiaojingkong and the old lady.

The old lady once again tried to distract him with her deceptive ways, but this time Xiaojingkong wasn’t easily fooled.

“I want it to be dark! I want it to be dark!!”

“It will be dark at night…”

“No, no! I want it now! Now! Wah—”

Understanding children usually don’t cry, but when they do, it’s hard for people to handle.

Xiaojingkong cried loudly, and his crying attracted all the villagers. Their questioning gazes made it seem as though the old lady had been abusing this little monk at home.

The old lady was completely overwhelmed!

The old lady, who hadn’t provided after-sales service the night before, eventually had to take all the responsibilities herself.

—

Gu Jiao was still unaware of Xiaojingkong’s meltdown after waking up; she had no experience in child care, and, having grown up neglected, she had no experience in this aspect.

If she had been picking mushrooms on the back mountain, she should have heard Xiaojingkong’s crying. She unfortunately had ventured a bit farther today, to the other side of the mountain to dig for bamboo shoots.

The time she’d adopted Xiaojingkong, she’d found bamboo shoots near the temple.

When she sold mountain products at the market, someone had exchanged some winter bamboo shoots for some of her fungus. She’d used the bamboo shoots to make chicken soup, and Xiao Liulang drank all of it.

She didn’t have any winter bamboo shoots now, but spring bamboo shoots also taste good.

The path in the woods was difficult to traverse, so not many people came to dig for bamboo shoots. Gu Jiao quickly filled up her little basket.

Just as she was about to descend the mountain, a painful groan came from deep in the woods.

Gu Jiao’s first reaction was that a villager was injured. Without any hesitation, she walked towards the source of the sound.

Arriving on the scene, she found a man had fallen into a two-meter-deep trap.

The trap looked familiar…

Well… it seemed like the one she’d dug earlier in the year.

Since there’d been no catches, she’d forgotten about the pit.

She’d never expected that after such a long time, she wouldn’t catch any game, but a human being would fall into it!

Who would dare venture this deep into the forest?

Gu Jiao poked her head over and looked into the deep pit.

The man, noticing a shadow overhead, immediately looked up.

Their eyes met, and they were both stunned.

“Is it you?”

“Is it you?”

They spoke in unison!

Gu Jiao: Isn’t this the stinky marquis who ran into my stuff on the street with his guards, knocked it over, and almost refused to compensate me?

Marquis Gu: Isn’t this the stinky girl who hit my guard on the street, extorted my money and hit me over the head?

Marquis Gu’s face immediately cooled, and the glimmer of hope for redemption that had been rising in his heart vanished into thin air.

Gu Jiao: Hehehe.

Gu Jiao turned around and walked away!

This person, she wasn’t saving!