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Chapter 576 Fake Fathers & Real Fathers

"Calm yourself, our termination of involvement comes with good reason."

"Then you better spit it out!"

"We are a liability." Michael took special care to emphasize that last word so that the gods could understand.

"...In what way?"

Gabriel suddenly pointed outside, or more specifically, to the several million angels in the refugee camp.

"Abaddon can... manipulate angels somehow. In heaven he took control of our brothers and sisters for several minutes and made them give he and his bride a concert. They don\'t even remember it happening."

Odin immediately looked alarmed as he stood up. "What!? And now you all are in my home!?"

"It\'s fine." Uriel dismissed with a wave of her hand. "He hasn\'t done anything to any of them at present."

"How can you possibly know that!?"

Uriel couldn\'t believe what she was about to say, but these words were the only ones present in her brain at the moment. "It\'s... not his way of doing things."

Thor slapped his belly and laughed merrily. "This is rich! One of heaven\'s most upstanding has fallen for the wiles of the dragon who crawled out of hell!"

Uriel\'s face went red as she slammed her hands on the tabletop; finding such an accusation to be entirely unfounded.

"You would smear my name with baseless accusations!? If you\'re so interested in Abaddon why don\'t I stick you in another dress and send you to his bedchamber!"

Thor rose up angrily. "That was ONE time, and I did it for the good of-"

"Both of you... shut up... no one cares." Odin looked to have aged 10,000 years since this conversation began.

Thor fell silent as he continued to glare at Uriel.

The archangel was remarkably patient, but for some reason she just couldn\'t let this insult slide by unpunished.

Azrael recognized that his sister was about to lose her temper, and he quickly tried to prevent it. "Uriel, sit down and let it g-"

"You\'re one to accuse someone of having feelings for him!" Uriel pointed at Thor. "Since your wife is currently following him around like a damned lapdog!"

Now, Thor was truly sober.

Odin\'s mouth fell open.

Huignn and Muinnin mirrored him.

And Azrael cursed himself for failing to stop this revelation.

He wasn\'t particularly inclined to hide any information about Abaddon, just as he wasn\'t inclined to keep any of the gods\' secrets either.

But Sif was different.

That was a subject that his mother had directly interfered in, and he would take her involvement to the grave if need be.

But Uriel had just shit the bed with her big mouth, so now Azrael had to play cleanup.

...Somehow.

"Sif... is with that monster...?" Thor asked carefully.

"And she\'s not a prisoner?" Odin asked warily.

Uriel stared into Thor\'s glowing blue eyes with great satisfaction and smiled coyly.

"She isn\'t being harmed, so don\'t worry. I don\'t believe they are sleeping together either since she wasn\'t fawning all over him.

But I overheard that he is her... oh, what do the humans call it in the modern era... her \'Baby Daddy\'.

As a catastrophic thunderstorm brewed overhead, Azrael knew that there was no longer any possible course to salvage this situation.

-

Observing the euruphate exams was a long and taxing process that had finally worn down on the generals just enough for them to seek a brief respite somewhere else.

And they wanted to do it in a particular fashion.

Abaddon had introduced a great many things into dragon society since he came to power.

Among those things was an appreciation for human cuisine and the cultures behind them.

And there is but one that is decidedly more popular than any other.

Barbecue!

Currently, the generals of every legion were at home on the rooftop garden, enjoying the warm and relaxing summery day.

A small speaker was seated underneath a tree, blaring out nothing but old soul classics.

A small pond had been created at Eris\' behest with the help of Tatiana, and it was there that a quartet of ladies were lounging out on patio chairs.

Currently, Kirina was sunbathing as she absentmindedly sang the words to \'Killing Me Softly With His Song by Fugees.\'

"I heard he sang a good song~ I heard he had a-"

*Sniff... Sniff.*

Grandma K opened one of her eyes and lifted her shades up when she heard the sound of crying coming from the side of her.

There, she found Jasmine crying while she was curled up in a ball.

Kirina didn\'t even need to ask what was wrong.

"I miss her so much!" she complained aloud.

"Kanami, it\'s your turn to deal with her..." Kirina simply readjusted her sunglasses and closed her eyes all over again.

On the opposite side of Jasmine, Kanami finally sat up and undertook the arduous task. "Jazzie, she\'s only been gone about a day. You can survive without Thea for that long at least."

"No I can\'t!"

"Jesus."

She finally glanced at their final member Stheno, who was sitting so still you could mistake her for being asleep.

"Can you say something to her, Sthen? I mean you\'re doing just fine, right?"

In a twist that no one could have anticipated, the knightmarish rabisu dragon clutched one of the outdoor pillows close to her chest and spoke in an abysmally low voice.

"I will be of no aid to you in this battle... I currently long for my Bell-Bear in a way that cannot be described."

"Jesus fucking christ!"

Several feet away, the men were having decidedly much more fun.

With variations of cuban cigars in their mouths and a icy cold bottle of beer in their hands, they looked to truly be living their best lives.

There were three large grills already burning, each being operated by Hajun, Asmodeus, and Darius, respectively.

The rabisu brothers Hakon and Absalom were playing the time honored role of \'meat moral support\'.

"I must say, those look mighty juicy..."

"I have to know, what\'s the secret to the seasoning blend you\'re using?"

Saying things like that was very important for the spirit of a cook out, as it keeps the grill master in rare form.

Belphegor was actually being helpful for once, and he was at his own station prepping vegetables, mixing potato salad, and slicing hunks of watermelon.

But among the men, there were two little additions who did not quite belong.

Little Courtney was seated on top of her grandfather\'s left shoulder, and Mira was practically glued to his right side.

The two were recieving a well-needed lesson from their grandfather that they would hopefully remember for the rest of their lives.

"Now pop quiz, girls; how can you tell if a man is lying to you?"

""If he\'s breathing!""

"My little angels are so damn smart!" Asmodeus beamed.

He cut two small pieces of roast chicken and fed the girls by hand, and smiled in appreciation as their faces beamed.

"Excuse me! Can one of you direct me towards someone?"

The atmosphere that was so fun and warm before seemed to change in less than a second.

Looking up, the group found an unfamiliar man standing in the garden with them.

He was tall, but shorter than everyone here except for the children.

He had a burly, yet stocky build, with a beard made from flame like a fire spirit.

The fact that no one recognized him wasn\'t an immediate cause for alarm, since not just anyone can arrive at this place.

But the pets at least didn\'t think like that.

In an instant, three ravenous beasts encircled him like he was prey.

"Oh my... this isn\'t exactly welcoming.... You all are an ugly sort, aren\'t you...?"

Bagheera and Camazotz, who were the pets most sensitive about their looks, reacted poorly to his choice of words.

In an instant, their size multiplied until they were as large as elephants and impossibly frightening.

To everyone except Courtney that is.

\'So cool! Monster pets!\'

Camazotz lunged forward like he was going to bite the intruder\'s head off when suddenly a shrill whistle stoped him in his tracks.

"Boys... get back." Asmodeus passed Courtney to Mira as he peeled off his sunglasses and walked from behind the grill.

Entei retreated immediately, but Camazotz and Bagheera seemed like they weren\'t fans of that order.

"Don\'t make me ask you twice."

Finally, the beasts returned to normal size and retreated, but neither of them looked particularly happy.

Asmodeus stared down at the strange man while inhaling his cigar.

He noted the bouquet of flowers and case of beer in the stranger\'s hands, and his brow lifted in confusion.

"You\'ll have to forgive me... I don\'t believe I\'ve laid eyes on you before."He finally said.

"Indeed not, son of the fallen. But I have seen you, and alternates of you, too many times to count." the man chuckled to himself. "The name is Gulban. I believe you should know it well."

Asmodeus said nothing as he ashed his cigar- the name clearly not ringing a bell.

"...I am Valerie\'s father." Gulban confessed.

Because Abaddon, and Valerie, hated the subject, they hadn\'t told the rest of their family much of anything about Gulban and his attempts to weasel his way back into her life.

All they knew was that he was something called a maker, and worked closely with the creator.

And neither Abaddon nor Val could stand the sight of him.

*Clang!*

The sound of metal striking metal rang out as Darius threw his tongs on the grill angrily.

The dwarven dragon ripped off his apron as he too approached Gulban, and he was more pissed off than anyone had ever seen him.

Valerie and Darius have a special relationship.

What first began as a sort of apprentice-master dynamic evolved into something closer to a father-daughter.

Much in the same way that Hajun tries to act as a father for all of the wives and not just Seras.

Valerie even had a decent relationship with Darius\' twin sons, and they referred to her as their \'other brother\'.

...Their comments often earned them black eyes and a couple of missing teeth.

Because they were so close, of course Darius knew just how much not having a father had affected Valerie.

Everything from her upbringing, to her personality, to her decision making in her adult life, was a near direct result of Gulban\'s absence.

And Darius, who always wanted a daughter but was never blessed with one, couldn\'t imagine subjecting an innocent little girl to that kind of abandonment.

Was he irresponsible? Sure!

A drunk? What dwarf isn\'t?!

But one thing that no one could ever say about Darius was that he was a bad father, and he prided himself on that if nothing else.

So of course, he had to say something now that this glorified sperm-donor had just showed up calling himself Valerie\'s father.

"Well... aren\'t you just the saddest sack of shit I\'ve ever laid eyes on."

"Excuse me...?" Gulban\'s eyes narrowed.

Darius removed the cigar in his mouth so that he could spit directly on the makr\'s boot.

"Make no mistake, you\'re souring my bloody good mood. If you don\'t fuck off right now, I\'m liable to lose my patience."

Gulban may not have been as powerful in Tehom since this wasn\'t a domain that he created, but he was still a maker nonetheless.

And a title like that carried with it an immense amount of pride.

So in his mind, he couldn\'t possibly move on from what he considered to be a lower life form spit on his shoe and disrespecting him in front of a crowd.

But Gulban had barely flexed his fingers when a new, much more familiar and frightening voice made him pause.

"If you so much as blink at him, I am going to tear your head off your body."