妻子的秘密

“What the hell do you mean my mustache is causing her to break down!? My mustache breathes elegance!”  Sir Tomas snapped back. He even pulled on it again. Oh god, this was getting to be too much. I could see that Adel had already turned around and was giggling away.

“Captain, look, even the princess can’t hold it in anymore. Just shave it off already!” The knight shot back. He had a huge grin on his face causing Sir Tomas to snort in dissatisfaction.

“You are just jealous! They are just shaking in reverence of my handsome stature. My Muna is a symbol of pride and my elegance as a knight that will always save a lady in need.” Sit Tomas retorted while once again making his mustache spring back into place.

“Pfft…. I can’t! It’s too much!” I couldn’t help it! He had actually named it! I burst out laughing right there on the spot. Adel had leaned into me, holding her stomach. She was already in tears.

“See, I told you!” The knight began laughing as well, causing Sir Tomas to snort in anger. “None of you understand!”_.

A few minutes later….

“So you wish to spar against one of my knights? You know this is no game, right? While we do have healers, you can still be run through or even have a limb chopped off.” Sir Tomas explained. But I still nodded my head. I wasn’t really worried about being hurt.

“If you wish to, then I do not mind. But you will need to sign a waiver. I do not want to be held responsible for whatever happens after.” Sir Tomas said as he waved his hand at one of the mages. They quickly presented a scroll that had words engraved with magic on it.

I read it through, and it only stated that any injuries that could not be healed through magic would not be the fault of the white knights and that my little life was my own, yaddi yadda, etc etc,  blah blah…. In other words, I signed it without hesitation.

That was how I found myself standing in front of a big burly knight with a large sword in his hand. “Missy, are you sure you want to do this?” The big burly knight named Stan asked.

“Yep! I want to see just how strong a knight is. I won’t be using any magic either. I will only be using my natural strength.” Although I say this, my strength was a bit off the charts. I am more worried about me hurting him than him hurting me.

“If that is what you want….” Sir Stan looked very conflicted about fighting me. But this just means I need to make it so he can’t feel conflicted at all.

Adel was at the side and looked at the two of us before shouting out: “Begin!”

As soon as those words were said, I shot forth and swung my sword at Sir Stan’s side. He was quick to go for the block, but I was putting my all into this attack, so as soon as our swords collided, I heard a yelp from in front of me, and a large body suddenly went flying off into the distance…. A loud crashing sound was heard, and screams coming from the other knights soon followed after. “Stan!”

I froze in place, and as if my neck was mechanical, it slowly turned to look at the figure now embedded into the wall. I then turned to look at Adel, who only shrugged at me. Then I looked at Sir Tomas, who was pulling on his mustache. Really!? In a time like this, does he really need to be doing the springy dance!?

“He’s okay!” I heard a knight yell out. But I still felt kind of nervous as I have just damaged a wall at the knights’ barracks. I mean, I swung with quite a bit of strength because he looked strong!

“That’s good.” Sir Tomas replied while clapping his hands. He then turned to me and asked: ” I would like for you to train my knights?”

“Wait! Why are you asking me to train your knights?” I asked in confusion. All I did was swing my sword and wack one of his men into a wall. I was not anywhere close to being as good with a sword as these knights.

“Because we don’t have anyone who can spar with your strength. With your strength, we can be taught how to deal with suddenly being smashed across the battlefield like a rag doll. We need to be able to train ourselves to be able to control our balance even in such situations as this.” Now I understand but still.

“I would love to help, but I will be under house arrest soon and will be training my academy team as well before and after my classes,” I explained.

“No problem, give us your address, and we will come to you.” Sir Tomas replied before turning to everyone and shouting: “Everyone, listen up, get in line so you can get smashed like Stan did. I will not hear no for an answer. If you do not get smashed today, I will make sure you lose a month’s pay!”

Wait!? What!? What is he doing!? Oi! Why are you all lining up with big smiles on your faces!? Is this really a knights’ barracks and not some kind of masochist farm!? I was starting to have my doubts about knights. I am starting to think they were all big Ms who loved to be punished more than anything. But I, of course, kept this thought to myself since this was also a good chance for me as well. “I do not mind, but I want one of your best swordsmen to train my team and me as well! Give and take, right?”

“Ah! Right! Give and take.” Hey Sir Tomas, the way your brow is twitching is not really making your words seem sincere. Did he expect me to do this all for free?

“Tomas, Faith is not making such a heavy demand. You were not just thinking of just taking advantage of her since she was little, right? I would suggest that you do not do that because you might die.” I heard David’s voice coming from behind us. I turned to see him walking over with a stern look on his face. His gaze slowly moved to Adel, who was somehow now standing behind Sir Tomas with her foot brought back. Is she secretly a ninja!? She was right next to me moments ago! My mouth went into an O shape as I watched her bring it straight up between Sir Tomas’s legs. And then David’s voice filled the air before a loud high, pitched scream was heard. “Ah… I was too late….”

“HiyaaahhhIii!”