BXBX NOVEL Chapter 148: Traversing the path with Sendai-san — 148
Chapter 148: Traversing the path with Sendai-san — 148
Translated by KaiesV
Edited by KaiesV
I walk with Sendai-san along the same path I walked with Maika for several days.
The word “deserved” has never been more applicable than today.
The streetlights are illuminating the road at night, but Maika’s words, which she told me just before we left, flicker in my mind and I feel as if I am walking down a road without lights. I know it was me who was at fault for lying, but I can’t help but complain to Sendai-san.
「Sendai-san, what is this?」
「What is?」
「You told Maika that you and me live together, Sendai-san.」
「I told her, but I couldn’t tell the rest of it.」
「We promised not to tell anyone about us.」
「That’s a promise we made only in high school.」
Sendai-san said without looking at me.
She is walking next to me, but her eyes are reflecting only things that are not me.
「Even if it was limited to that, it’s terrible to tell people we live together without my permission.」
I know it’s just an eight-pointed gesture, but my mouth moves of its own accord when I think about meeting Maika.
「I think it was Miyagi who’s worse. You haven’t come back anytime soon, and you haven’t contacted me to let me know where you are going. It wouldn’t be surprising if I was worried and I went looking for you. Besides, you said it yourself, Miyagi. I told Utsunomiya that we were living together. It wouldn’t be strange for me to ask Utsunomiya about Miyagi’s whereabouts after hearing that, would it?」
Sendai-san’s assertion is correct.
Who was the roommate?
Since I told Sendai-san that I told that to Maika correctly, she is not at fault for acting on that basis. But Sendai-san must not have thought I had told Maika the truth. I think she should have expected that I was lying and could have kept Maika from telling her that we were living together.
Of course, I am the one who is at fault, no matter what I think.
It is wrong to blame Sendai-san.
I know that.
I should not complain, nor should I blame her.
Then I will have no choice but to say what I was going to do and couldn’t.
「I was going to return even if you didn’t come looking for me.」
「When would that be?」
「Tomorrow.」
I couldn’t put it into action, but I did think about it.
「I didn’t hear anything about that.」
Sendai-san said in a whispered voice.
She still doesn’t look at me.
She only looks down and walks.
It didn’t sound like she was angry, but she didn’t look at me. I am also relieved that she doesn’t look at me, because it’s hard for me to face Sendai-san. But at the same time, I am a little disappointed in Sendai-san for not seeing me.
「You came before I could contact you, Sendai-san.」
「If you’re going to call me, call me soon. I’ve been waiting a long time.」
「…Sorry.」
I finally told her now the words I had to say as soon as I left Maika’s house, but Sendai-san didn’t look at me. Staring at the ground, she replied,「I’m sorry I told Utsunomiya about me and Miyagi.」
I thought I was the only one who felt awkward, but Sendai-san may feel the same way. Still, we are able to continue our conversation thanks to Maika, who shines her light on us like a street lamp. Her upbeat approach to the conversation kept it from becoming too serious.
「…Why did you go to the university to look for me?」
I know it was because I was worried, but I couldn’t help asking.
「Like I said before, Miyagi never came home.」
Sendai-san blurted out.
I knew she was not looking at me, so I could not clearly see what kind of face whe was making. Maybe if I grabbed her arm and called out「Sendai-san,」she would look at me, but I couldn’t muster the courage to think about what would happen if she didn’t see me. We walk toward the station, not knowing if the stars are shining in the night sky.
「You didn’t have to ask Maika to come to me.」
When I asked without turning toward Sendai-san, the answer came quietly.
「I met Utsunomiya before Miyagi, so I have no choice. I felt bad, but I couldn’t afford it either, and if Miyagi wasn’t available, I had to call on Utsunomiya.」
「……Did you tell her anything else besides that we live together?」
「A story about borrowing money from Miyagi at a bookstore. Also, Utsunomiya didn’t know we were living together, so she asked why we were living together, and I told her we were friends. I’ve told her to ask you for more details, and Utsunomiya may ask you something.」
Sendai-san spoke too irresponsibly and took two steps ahead.
I involuntarily grabbed her clothes.
Although I deserved to be questioned by Maika about my relationship with Sendai-san, I didn’t think that Sendai-san was throwing the whole situation to me without explaining the situation at all.
「Not only might I be asked, but Maika just asked me to explain why I’m living with Sendai-san. What should I say?」
「Didn’t you say anything to Utsunomiya when we were in high school?」
Sendai-san, who has moved forward two steps, continues to walk with her clothes still in my grasp.
「I’m not going to tell her. We promised not to tell anyone about what happened after school.」
「Utsunomiya, she seemed to think we were friends, and she really did talk a little bit, didn’t she?」
「Did you tell your friends, Sendai-san?」
「Even if I didn’t have an appointment, there’s no way I could talk it to them.」
Sendai-san exhales loudly and stops.
I let go of the clothes I was holding on to, and Sendai-san looked at me.
Under the street lamps, I see her face, as always, well-dressed as ever. Although she doesn’t have the smile I’ve seen so often lately, she still looks the same as she did when she went to college, and seeing her like that makes me feel as if my days of being next to her are back to normal.
「What should I say to Maika next time I see her?」
I picked up the large bag on my shoulder and lightly shook it to hit Sendai-san.
「If you honestly tell her that you came to live with me because of what you were ordering me to do for 5,000 yen…」
「How could I say that?」
「Then, get over the fact that we became friends because of the money I borrowed.」
Sendai-san says in a brighter voice than before and starts to walk away. The street lamps illuminating her two steps ahead of me seem awfully bright.
「If we decide that we were friends, how can I tell Maika that I told her in high school that I didn’t get along with Sendai-san?」
「If you say we didn’t have any contact at school and it was hard for you to say…」
「Sendai-san, you’re saying it randomly because it’s not about you. Think about it properly. Maika, I don’t think she’ll get mad, but I don’t know what would happen if I said something too random.」
「If she gets angry, just apologize. I think if you apologize to Utsunomiya properly, she will forgive you.」
「I apologize and I’m sure she’ll forgive me, but I don’t know if she’ll be convinced for the right reasons.」
Sendai-san is right, Maika will forgive me if I apologize properly. Even if it’s for the right reasons, if it’s something I don’t want to hear, I won’t force her to hear it, and what the heck, she’ll forgive me. However, there are too many lies that have been told about Sendai-san. Maika as usual would not force me to reveal the secret, but I don’t know what will happen this time.
「Tell her I didn’t want anyone to know that I was friends with Miyagi, so you kept her in the dark.」
「That makes Sendai-san the bad guy, right?」
「It’s fine, I’ll take the bad guy role.」
Sendai-san says casually and smiles.
It’s not fair that she can make me smile at times like this.
Sendai-san, who is always gentle, appears even gentler.
I want to be next to her all the time.
「I’m not alright with that.」
I stopped and hit Sendai-san with my bag.
But Sendai-san didn’t stop.
「It’s fine. That would solve what you couldn’t say in high school. You can think about the details later, like how you got better, or how you didn’t tell her we were roommates.」
Sendai-san, walking a little ahead of me, says in a light tone.
I continue to watch her back.
「Miyagi, don’t stop, just walk.」
About ten steps in front of me, Sendai-san looks back.
Our eyes meet, and my heart pounds.
「Sendai-san, why are you being so nice to me? Like I said, I was going to return tomorrow without looking you for me.」
「Are you really?」
「I was going to call you.」
「If you’d contacted me, I might have gone looking for you.」
A flat voice is heard.
I have no idea what she meant by the words she uttered.
「Why?」
「——What if I told you: I can’t wait for tomorrow to come?」
「Why not just wait another day or so?」
「I missed Miyagi so much that I couldn’t wait one more day.」
Sendai-san walks toward me, saying in a voice so serious that it sounds deliberate.
One step, two steps, three steps.
Little by little, she comes closer and stops in front of me.
「That’s full of lies…」
I said in a voice that was not strong but not weak, and Sendai-san laughed as if she were troubled. Somehow, I feel like I’ve done something terribly wrong and I can’t move.
No doubt she was worried about me.
That is evident in the messages that were sent.
But there is no way Sendai-san would want to see me so badly that she couldn’t wait another day.
Without looking back into the past, I don’t recall doing anything that would make her want to see me. She was always selfish and tried to keep me away from her many times. Even this time, I sneaked out. It is strange that she wants to see me like that.
「Not as much as Miyagi.」
Sendai-san turns to me with a smile I see often.
「It’s getting late now, let’s go home quickly.」
I hear a gentle voice.
Still my feet don’t move.
「If you won’t walk, I’ll hold your hand and pull you along.」
After saying this, Sendai-san starts to walk away.
After silently watching her back, Sendai-san immediately turned around.
「Miyagi, start walking.」
「If I didn’t walk, wouldn’t you hold my hand?」
「Don’t act like a child, walk around by yourself.」
Sendai-san comes back with a sigh. Then, after a little hesitation, she grabbed the handle of my bag and pulled it.
Instead of hands not being held together, the bag becomes lighter.
Sendai-san starts to walk, and I move my feet to follow my bag as she tries to go ahead of me.
「Why didn’t you come home until today?」
Sendai-san, walking next to me, says quietly.
「…It was just hard to face you.」
「I figured as much.」
「Sorry.」
I apologized in a small voice and Sendai-san looked at me as usual, calling me in her usual voice,「Hey, Miyagi.」
「What is it?」
「Let’s go shopping together for earrings.」
「For you, Sendai-san?」
「For you, Miyagi. I’ll buy you something pretty.」
Sendai-san says in a soft voice and pulls the bag.
「I don’t want it.」
「It’s part of the punishment game. You broke the rule about calling in when you’re going to stay out, so grow up and get your earrings bought.」
「You called me.」
「That’s not even a call. If I hadn’t contacted you, you wouldn’t have come back without saying anything.」
That’s true, but I don’t want to say that it was true.
Well, I don’t need one or two more piercings.
I don’t want Sendai-san to buy them, but I have no choice.
「…When we’re going?」
「Any day Miyagi wants to go is fine.」
Her gentle voice melt into the night sky.
Sendai-san walks slowly.
As I walked slowly, matching her stride, I felt the flow of time slow down.