BXBX NOVEL Chapter 503 Do You Understand Now?
My biggest issue right now, besides not being able to have chocolate or coffee, was that everything that I had in my head to do when I was first reborn back into this life was done. So, where did I go from here?
Would the guys be happy going to the cabin for the rest of their lives… their very, very long lives… or would they want to go back to the ranch and live near City A? Wang Chao still had his sister and her family around… maybe he wanted more time with them.
What about our children? Would I want them to live at the ranch with everyone else, or did I want to raise them without the pressures of everything? Would we stop at just the twins? Would we have more? Did I want more? What was it that I wanted?
I froze when I realized that I had no idea how to even answer that question. I had to want something. There should be a picture in my head about what the future would look like… and yet… there was nothing.
I slowly made my way up the old wooden steps and into my bedroom. Everything was exactly how I remember it, down to the overly large black cat sitting on the foot of my bed.
"Hello, old friend," I said, going to sit down carefully beside him. He purred as my fingers stroked through this fur. "Are you happy?" I asked, staring at the first being to make friends with me when I came here. I still remember how small he was when I first saw him… only fitting in the palm of my hand.
He looked at me thoughtfully as if understanding my words and nodded his head.
"Thank you for everything," I whispered, bending over so that my face was planted in his coat. "Thank you for taking this journey with me, even if I forgot about you more than half the time." I rubbed my face in his tummy, enjoying the feeling of him as he let out a huff.
He gently smacked me on the head, letting me know that he had enough, and I sat back up. I was not going to risk his wrath by continuing with what I was doing. He had already been more than patient with me so far.
Letting out a chuckle, I stood up and slipped out of my clothes, happy to no longer have the pressure against my stomach. Ugh, I was really starting to hate pants with zippers and buttons.
Turning on the shower, I got in, taking my time to enjoy the sensation of having the water running down my body. I washed my hair more than a few times, getting the grime out of it. I then moved on to the rest of my body and face, taking my time. There was no way I was getting out of here before I absolutely had to.
Probably half an hour later, I turned off the water and quickly dried myself off. Standing in front of my closet, my hair up in a towel, I looked at my clothes and wondered what I should wear. I was no longer worried about the world outside of my space. There was nothing there that was dangerous enough to hurt me, so I didn\'t have to stick with pants and a shirt. I walked down to the last item in my wardrobe and pulled it out. It was absolutely perfect.
Dropping my towel, I put on my chosen undergarments, an actual bra and underwear. It would be a cold day in Hell before I put on another sports bra. Those things were a bitch to get on and off. And the girls no longer had to be plastered to my chest.
The white cotton dress that I had chosen slipped effortlessly over my head and hugged every curve. The material was soft, flowy, and very feminine.
Drying off my hair and slipping on a pair of soft, white skippers, I made my way past the black cat and downstairs to the kitchen. Looking around at my safe space, I let out a long sigh. I pulled an apron on over my dress and got to work on my chores.
It took me more than a few hours to collect the apples from the orchard and the eggs from the chickens. And that didn\'t include the time it took to make sure that everyone was fed. There were six more horses than I was expecting in one of the pastures, but I really didn\'t mind. Hopefully, Cerberus and the rest of them could enjoy their days out in the pasture and not as vehicles in the modern world.
Walking back inside, I washed the apples and put them into the fruit bowl to be used later. The eggs went into another bowl on the counter where they, too, would be used for something in the near future.
I stared out of the window onto the farmland of my space. My hands gently rubbed my belly where two precious bundles of joy lay, growing big and strong with every passing minute. I didn\'t know what the future held, and that was… exciting.
"Do you understand now?" asked Violence, coming up to stand beside me. It felt like I hadn\'t seen her in forever, and yet I knew she was always there inside of me.
"Which part?" I asked, not bothering to turn around to look at her. I watched as four horses ganged up on a much smaller mare, nipping her in the hind quarters. The fifth horse simply shook his head, not wanting anything to do with it.
"The part that I am Hades, Goddess of the Underworld? The fact that nothing exists outside of the world that I am currently in? That the humans were nothing more than the souls released from the Underworld? That the zombies were my minions, sent after the humans to bring them back? Or the fact that I destroyed both Heaven and Hell when I shattered over a thousand years ago?" I asked, keeping my eye on Cerby to make sure that he was okay.
"Well, it seems like you have a good handle on everything then," said Violence after a pause. "But I didn\'t really expect you to remember everything."
"For the most part, I didn\'t," I answered with a shrug of my shoulders. "It wasn\'t until I realized that the guys were willing to suppress a part of themselves to make me happy at the Reaver encampment that I truly understood and remembered everything."
"Huh," grunted Violence, picking up an apple from the fruit bowl beside her and starting to munch on it. "So, you know that they are now stuck in limbo along with everyone else while you are here staring outside a window?"
"Yup," I answered with a nod. "Because the \'real world\' was created by me as a way to rebuild. Nothing happens there unless I want it to. And I can reset it any time I want."
"I am sure that the other Gods are going to want to dip their fingers into your world. Demeter\'s son is still living in it after all."
"Let her try," I shrugged, not at all worried about my bitch of a sister. It was enough of a blessing that Bin An Sha was no longer obsessed with me and had apparently moved on to a new interest. However, I had learned my lesson well enough to not let her mettle in the affairs of my kingdom. I hope that Wu Bai Hee will keep her busy for a while or, at the very least, out of my hair for the foreseeable future.
I turned my attention back to the window and my little space of Heaven within the Underworld. Looking back at this life, I wouldn\'t have changed a thing. Even trusting the men from the very beginning, leaving before the EMP hit, rescuing Liu Yu Zeng and Chen Zi Han. Nothing. I would have done it all over again since it brought me to this point right now.
Once again, rubbing my stomach, I smiled at my thoughts. Things had a really weird way of working out.
"Why did you trust the guys so fast?" asked Violence, leaning against the counter and watching the horses play.
"Part of me, one that I didn\'t even know existed, wanted to," I replied with a soft smile. I couldn\'t explain the draw that I had to the guys when I first met them… all I knew was that they were worth throwing out all of my steps for.
"That was probably Romance trying to get things moving faster," nodded Violence, an answering smile on her face.
"Maybe, or maybe it was because of a quote I had read once, a few lifetimes ago."