Chapter 687
As the rays of the morning sun flooded her windows, so thus, all her memories of last night. Upon seeing the man lying beside her, wide awake and staring at her, a giddy feeling invaded her body, looking through his expressive eyes.
Still, guilt also nagged at her, bothering her mind, heart, and conscience. What now?
She immediately ran to the bathroom and locked herself in the room, trying to calm herself down. Hoping when she had returned, Lance would be gone.
But to her surprise, Lance was still waiting for her in her room. She assumed he would have left just like before, now leaving her more confused than ever.
With her robe safely secured around her, she felt more confident facing him. She moved closer to the bed, watching him, waiting for him to say something, anything, to break the awkward silence.
“Why did you do that?” She finally asked the man who was now sitting on the edge of the bed, with his pants and shirt partially buttoned. Still, she could not help but blame him for what happened.
.....
However, she could also not deny she was equally responsible for allowing him. She was ashamed for wanting it as much as he did. In her defense, she still maintained if he had not initiated the kiss, they would not end up in this situation.
She wondered if she could repeat that scene last night when he entered her door. Could she stop him by then? Or would she replicate the same scenario?
“I want you.” It was a simple answer. Even a child would understand those easy words, but her brain seemed unable to register them properly, thinking they were foreign.
She watched him lean his elbows on his knees, supporting his upper body as he looked down on the floor. She wondered what was going through his mind when he said that.
Did he mean it?
“Do not say that.” Covering her ears as if that would block what was already running through her mind.
She turned around, not wanting him to see the struggle in her eyes. Her heart wanted to believe those words, but her logical mind still warned her not to take them seriously.
“Why not?” His question took her aback. But she was not about to believe that a man like him would want a girl like her.
She moved further away from him, going nearer the window. She needed to look at something else because her mind insisted that she should face him. But she could not.
She was afraid that, after looking at him, she would find something she was not ready to see. She was terrified to hope. Because when that happened, she would get hurt.
“Because this is not real, Lance.” She finally voiced out what was going through her mind.
Suddenly, she was facing him. Her mind was so focused on the world outside that she did not notice him moving in her direction. She suddenly found herself in his arms.
His eyes were blazing with anger as if her words angered him. His arms held her tightly against his body while his eyes held hers captive. She had nowhere to go.
“Then, what am I to you? An imagination? A dream?” His tone was ice-cold as his eyes forced her to listen. “Everything that happened the other night and last night was more real to me than all my past relationships.”
She tried to look away, but she could not as he trapped her between his body and the wall behind her. “You are only saying that, but what happened to us was just sex.”
She grabbed him by his head, forcing his lips down to hers, then kissed him. She wanted to show him that what they had was nothing but lust, a pure carnal need of the flesh.
Eida kissed him with passion, but she quickly let go of him. “I can kiss you, and I can kiss any guy that walks to that door.” Pointing the door to him. “This meant nothing to me.”
Suddenly, her brain took over her emotions, reminding her that she should have ended this last night. There was no point prolonging her agony, knowing that this man would never belong to a girl like him.
A Noble Prince, like him, did not end up with a thrash like her. One word got out that they were in a relationship, and the world would be pouring all her dirty past into the mix. It would instantly ruin him.
A man like him should be marrying Amelia, who was what he needed. A woman that he could be proud to have standing behind him. Not her.
“You can say what you want, but I know what I feel every time you are in my arms. You can deny it all you want, but your body tells me otherwise.” This time, his lips claimed hers, not forcefully but passionately.
His hands moved around her back, pulling her closer until no more space stood between them. Then, she felt lost again as her brain lost the battle with her heart.
She wanted him, and there was no denying it. But how could they even make this work? How could she hurt a dear friend if she learned that she was going after the same man?
She was not even sure if she loved him. In her vocabulary, wanting and loving were two completely different things. Besides, she had no idea how to love.
“I don’t know what to do.” She finally admitted her fear. “I never felt like this before.” She mumbled to his lips, hoping that he could help her.
“We will figure this out together.” He answered her, carrying her back to the bed, laying her gently on the soft bed, like she was a treasure he needed to cherish.
Nobody had ever made her feel like that, only him. He had made her seem like a rare gem despite all her flaws.